Break Me

chapter twelve

The next day at school is painfully slow. It seems like a whole day goes by before we even get to lunch.

Maybe it's because I don't have Henry or Anna to keep me company. They're both on a field trip for one of the classes they share together and they won't be back until the end of the day. So I'm stuck here by myself with no one to talk to except for Noah who I've seen only once today in the hallway.

I decide to skip lunch and just go to the library and eat a small snack in there.

"Vanessa it's so good to see you" a witchy sounding voice makes me lift my head.

I look up to see Tana walking towards me.

This is just great.

She's alone this time, she doesn't have her three minions behind her like she normally does. So this is a one on one thing which is even more delightful.

I give her a small smile and try to move past her but she blocks me.

"You looked so pretty at homecoming"

I can hear the sarcasm laced in her voice. We've gone this long without talking, why start now.

"You could imagine everyones surprise when you walked in with Mason because that's just-" she cuts herself off by laughing. "I'm surprised you even let him take you considering you know"-she gestures with her hands-"I don't really see you as a charity case"

I snap my eyes up at her. What is she talking about? A charity case?

"What do you mean?" I ask with a slight tremble in voice.

I know what she says next isn't going to be good, and after the weekend I just had I don't know if I'll be able to handle it.

"Well you know Mason picks some girl every year to go to homecoming with him as kind of like a charity. He makes them feel all good and pretty and then when he gets there he usually leaves them alone to go talk shit about them with his friends. Last year he took this girl named Mary Louise and she transferred about a week after, it gets pretty brutal. I can't imagine the things they were saying about you" she chuckles.

I have to bite my lip extremely hard to keep myself from breaking down.

I am the biggest idiot ever.

I should have just listened to my first instinct when it came to him.

Suddenly I feel like I'm trapped in such a small box and I can't move or breathe or speak.

Tana says something else but I don't hear her I just watch as she walks away smugly. That's when I look up and see Masons grey eyes looking at mine with a confused look on his face.

But he's standing all the way at the other end of the hallway and he doesn't even get the chance to move one foot towards me because I turn and run up the stairs as fast as my legs will allow me.

I run up the stairwell and into the second floor bathroom and slip into one of the stalls locking it behind me.

No tears come from my eyes but I begin to hyperventilate and it takes me just about the whole lunch period to calm myself down.

I refuse to let myself cry at school, especially since I just learned I was the charity case at this years homecoming dance that I didn't even want to go to.

So I suck in a deep breath and pull myself together putting on the hard face that I used to wear at my school in Vermont.

You can cry all you want when you get home. I tell myself. For now, keep it together.