Unmasked Love | The Mandalorian

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|Trigger Warning: There is a heavy description of a panic attack during the first half of this chapter. If you do not feel comfortable or safe reading this, please skip over the first half. There is a break halfway through the chapter where the story resumes at a place that is completely safe for all readers. Again, please proceed with caution and/or skip the first half if necessary. Love y'all, stay safe! <3|

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Hot watered furiously sprayed from the showerhead above me, the heat of the water burning away the remnants of the hangover that had seemed to encase me as the water trickled down my skin. The water felt like it was practically burning holes through my skin, but I ignored the red hot sting. 

I guess you could say that it wasn't a surprise that I felt like I could barely even breathe. 

I mean, I had left behind one of the few people in the galaxy that I could truly say I loved, on a planet that Moff Gideon had just presented his abrasive fucking appearance on. I was furious and grief-ridden, but I couldn't do anything about it. 

As if the thought of leaving Adrienne behind wasn't suffocating and heart-wrenching enough, the steam had also built up in the small bathroom and it was making my lungs feel heavy and constricted in my own chest. It was getting more than just hard to breathe, but for some reason, I felt obligated to just sit through it and take it all in. It was as if I physically needed to stand here and let my head feel like it was going to buzz for the rest of eternity. 

I close my eyes and plant my hands on the cold wall in front of me, letting the water flood over my head, forcing my hair to flatten from the intense pressure of the water. My breaths were short and shallow, barely even making my chest move. 

My head spins for a moment and I press the pads of my fingers against the wall to ground myself and to keep myself from actually falling over all the way. The pads of my fingers squeak against the smooth white walls of the shower, forcing me to twitch my head to the side from the unwanted noise. 

My skin goes numb and flushes red. 

I squeeze my eyes shut a little tighter and her voice echoes in the back of my head. 

"Are you alright, lovely?"

I ball my hands into fists and press my knuckles against the wall, trying to suck in a decent breath of air, but all it does is make my head spin even more. I clench my jaw as her face appears in my head. 

I can't believe I fucking left here there all alone to deal with him. Him of all fucking people. And she hasn't sent a message saying that she was okay yet. It's been hours and I haven't heard from her yet. It was starting to make my head hurt. For all I know, she could be dead-

"Mae, you alright in there?"

I shove my hands against the wall and stumble backward, pressing my back against the other white wall behind me. I gasp from how cold the pristine white wall was, then blinking a few times to get myself to focus. My chest heaves for a few more breaths before I even try to answer.

"Mae?"

"Yeah! I'm alright," I stammer, running my hands over my face a few times to calm myself down and clear my head. "I'll be out in a minute."

"I don't mean to rush you right now, but there's something you're going to want to see," he continues, sounding a little uneasy. What if it was a message from Adrienne saying that she was okay and safe? It could be that, right? She could actually be okay. 

"I'll be there in a few," I say, trying to mask my apprehension and nervousness. I hear his footsteps trail away and I let out a heavy breath, hoping he had already walked away far enough so he couldn't still hear me.