Unavoidable

Chapter 8

As I'm sitting there sobbing I hear a knock at the door. I can't bring myself to get up to answer it nor do I want to. I'm guessing it's JJ or Reid coming to check on me. I put my head in between my knees as I cry.

"Lilith?" I hear a voice say softly. I can't quite place the voice over my sobs, but I think it's JJ. I don't want to look up to confirm who it is though because that would mean I would have to face what has me feeling this way. A soft hand lifts me up onto the bed and removes my head from between my knees. My cries are quieter now but show no signs of stopping. I keep my eyes screwed shut so I don't have to deal with what's causing my outburst. The voice shushes me gently and pulls me into her arms. I wrap my arms around her and sob into her chest. I inhale sharply and get a whiff of perfume. It's warm and almost woodsy but still feminine at the same time. I immediately realize it's not JJ. I pull away far enough to see and open my eyes. Through the tears I can see raven colored hair and I can tell it's Prentiss comforting me. I don't care anymore, I'm too drunk and upset to mind that it's Prentiss that came up here. I lean back in and wrap my arms around her once again. She strokes my hair as she holds me and I nestle in to the hollow of her shoulder. We sit like this until I calm down.

"Are you okay? We can talk about it if you want? Or I can get JJ or someone you prefer over me. I know I'm not your first choice to talk to so you know what? I'll just go get JJ," She says and she starts to pull away.

"No, Emily, please stay. I'm better now and I actually would really like to talk about it," I say to her, surprising us both. I think she smiled when I said that too and my heart flutters in my chest a little but I just amount it to the alcohol and nothing else. I take a deep breath and pull back a bit, but I keep my arms around her for support.

"When I first started high school, I had no friends. I was new to the school and didn't know anyone. People at my school didn't particularly like me and I had a really rough time. About three months in at my new school, I met Claire. She was new and I didn't want her to be treated the same way as me. We became best friends and we were inseparable. I don't think we ever spent more than a few days apart all of high school until senior year. She got a boyfriend who was a couple years older. I warned her that something was off about him but she didn't listen. They had never met in person, only over the internet. I was worried about her and it drove us apart. The last time I saw her was when I went to her house before she was going to meet him. I begged her not to go meet him," I have to stop for a second to calm my breathing before continuing. "But she didn't listen. She told me she was going to the park to meet him and then she left. I never saw her again. Her boyfriend wasn't the 19 year old college student he told her he was, he was a 45 year old man who kidnapped her, raped her, and then murdered her. They found her body a month later in a ditch. The last thing we did was fight and all I really wanted to tell her that day was that I loved her. I was in love with Claire. For almost four years, I suffered through her falling for other people, when all I really wanted was for her to love me," I finish my story and I don't even realize I started crying again until Emily gently wipes the tears off my cheeks.

"Lilith, I'm sure she loved you. It was not your fault that happened, you did everything you could," She says to me. I shake my head.

"I know she loved me, Emily but I wanted her to love me love me," I say, dropping my head to hide the fresh flow of tears.

"Hey, hey come here," She grabs me and pulls me close again. I let her hold me for the second time tonight and I cling to her. The sobs start again and Emily comforts me until I calm down again.

"I'm sorry," I say. "I've never told anyone that before. It feels good to get it off my chest. Thank you, for checking on me and listening."

"Of course. I know we haven't always gotten along and I know that's definitely because of me so I've been wanting to make it up to you. I hope after tonight we can have a fresh start," Emily says to me.

"I would like that very much actually," I say to her. She smiles, like a real smile, and I'm dazzled by how beautiful she is for a minute. I remove my arms from around her to wipe away the remaining tears. I start to make a move to get up and Emily stands up with me.

"Are you okay to get ready for bed now?" She asks and I nod. I head into the bathroom and change into my shorts and tank top before brushing my teeth and taking off the makeup. Not that there's too much to take off anymore. The crying did a pretty good job of that. I head back into the bedroom and Emily takes my place in the bathroom. I don't make a move for the couch and instead get into the bed. I curl up on my side in a fetal position and try to keep the image of Claire out of my mind. I hear Emily leave the bathroom and climb into bed. She can tell by my body language I don't want to talk anymore and she turns the light off. After about ten minutes, I think Emily is finally asleep and I let the tears start again. I try to muffle my sobs but I after about a minute I feel Emily turn to me and pull me to her. I let her hold me again. The front of her body is flush against the back of mine. Her arms snakes around to wrap around my midriff and I hold on to her arm. As I lay in her arms, I feel the waves of sleep coming to take me and I let them. I think I feel her place a soft kiss against my hair but in my half sleep, I can't tell for sure.