"He carries stars in his pockets
because he knows
she fears the dark.
Whenever sadness pays her a visit
he paints galaxies
on the back of her hands." ― Alaska Gold, Growing Light
She
"Whore!"
"Please, please. I was just being polite. He used to work at the gallery. He came to say hello..."
"Liar. I saw how you looked at him. You should be ashamed for behaving like a whore in front of your daughter. You are raising her to be like you, a useless whore."
Her sobs pierce the air, but I can't see her face from where I stand hidden behind the half-closed door.
"I swear, James. I would never..." tears make her voice break ."I love you... I would never."
"You know what to do."
"No, please."
"If you love me, you shouldn't make me force you. Don't you think it pains me too? But You have to be punished, otherwise, you will never learn."
Such a beautiful voice. I can't help thinking of how dad always says mean things with such a beautiful voice.
"Can... can I have something, like the other time, to... to make it easier..."
He leaves the room, taking large steps with his tall legs. Maybe I should go hug mom and make it better. Could I do that? Make it better? No, I should stay here, quiet. That's what they always tell me, to be quiet.
He returns too fast, a bottle with an amber liquid in hand. "I shouldn't... I'm too good for you, but here, to make you numb..."
Mom grabs the bottle "Yes... make me numb, make the fear numb..."
I hear the closet door open. Mom takes small steps, even though her legs are tall too. Her hands are shaking so badly. Her wedding ring bumps against the bottle non-stop. The sound gets louder, faster. Why is it so loud?
Metal against the glass. Force versus Fragility. And Fear, so much fear...
The clicking sound gets louder, faster, louder... my eardrums may explode...
My scream woke me. Or maybe I woke up just so I could scream. I was never sure. The bedside lamp was still on, helping me to separate the world of dreams from the real one. It took me a while to register why I was lying in a dark wood bed instead of my white one. If Jake didn't appear stumbling through the door, it would have taken longer.
"Jake..."
Jake's room. La Rosa Bay. Natalie. Salty kisses.
"It's ok, baby," his arms were already around me. "It was just a bad dream. Shhhhh" he rocked me against his body, kissing my hair. "It's gone now. You are safe; No one will hurt you. It's ok."
I let him cradle me for a while, thinking it was doing us both some good.
"Where were you?" I asked finally, still enjoying the warmth of his chest.
"Downstairs. I fell asleep on the couch."
I stood up straighter. "Really?"
He shrugged, "Not really, no. I was just too lazy to get the linens and make the bed in one of the other rooms."
YOU ARE READING
Chasing Stars ✔️
Romance*Featured story* "An absolute void was embracing me, a sensation that was all too familiar to me. As far as I could remember, that was what my dreams were made off. I used to describe them as being afloat in the night sky with no stars." In recovery...
