zero • njh

• twentytwo •

   The night is horrible. I'm wide awake basically all night, even though I thought talking with Zayn about everything would calm me down. Don't get me wrong, it did - but only while he was around. My head is spinning around all the things that could happen, depending on what decision I make.
If I turn myself in dad is going to be beyond pissed and will probably kick me out of the house. And if he doesn't, he'll make sure that the rest of my days in this house are going to be worse than hell. Do I want to risk that? I don't know. 

   If I make Niall turn himself in, maybe I'll save my relationship with dad, but what will his dad say? I don't know him but considering the things I do know about him, he won't be very pleased. Maybe that will cause Niall to never be able to become a musician. What's even worse about that is, that he will inevitably move to London.
   The question to ask now is if there is a possibility that neither Niall nor I have to go to the police. It would erase all of my worries and I could go on, hoping to stay with Niall until the end of time.

   But I guess life isn't as easy as that.

   "I want a decision by this afternoon." dad says, standing in the kitchen in the morning. He's wearing his uniform and eating an apple.
   "Sure." I reply and grab a banana. My mind is clouded from the sleep deprivation and I'm afraid won't be able to function properly. Not that that's the case for any other day. 

   I start making a coffee, praying that dad finally has to go and leaves me alone to my thoughts, but of course he still has something to say.
   "Listen," he stops and sighs. I turn around to look at him and cross my arms. "this could ruin your life. Do you understand that?"
   "I do, dad. But this is not just about me. It could ruin my life just as much as it could ruin Niall's life."
   "Yes, but he has to face the consequences for his actions."
   "As do I."
Again, he sighs frustrated and leans on the kitchen island. I have the feeling, that he's trying to understand me but it just doesn't work. His mindset is just too narrow.

    School is just as horrible as the night was, if not worse.

    I fall asleep way too often and I can't concentrate at all. This situation is too much to handle for me. I need to talk to Niall as soon as possible. We need to decide together what to do. Catching him to talk is going to be a challenge, since we agreed on keeping our relationship on the lowkey for now. And honestly, I don't mind keeping my privacy. I'm really not keen on having all the girls' burning glares on me when they find out that the handsome Horan is taken by a quiet weirdo like me.

    After texting Niall that it is urgent that we talk, we agree on meeting after soccer practice on the parking lot. It takes ages for everyone to leave and I can't imagine how it must be for Niall to shower and get dressed as slow as he can, to make sure he's the last one to leave. I would've lost my mind already.

   When he walks outside the building, straight towards his car, which I'm leaning on, I can't help but smile. His hair is damp and sticks to his skin. He wears his bag over his shoulder and put on the sweater with the teams lion logo printed on it.

   "Well, the princesses really did take their beauty time, eh?" I ask him chuckling as he walks over to the trunk, opening it with a slightly annoyed face. Aggressively, he throws the bag into his car.

    "I'm never doing that again, I swear on my life." he slams the trunk shut and walks over to the drivers seat, where he throws himself into the car. I follow his lead, sitting down on the passengers seat, while he keeps throwing a tantrum. "I knew Joey could talk a lot, but holy shit! That guy could be a woman, that's how much he talks. He just wouldn't just up about his damn new puppy Theodora. Who names his dog fucking Theodora?!" Niall sighs loudly and looks at me. I can't help but smile at his anger.