𝑾𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒇𝒍𝒐𝒘𝒆𝒓 ➸𝑨𝒍𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒐𝒏 𝑨𝒓𝒈𝒆𝒏𝒕 ꟾ𝟏ꟾ

I Am Not Okay

^^This is what I imagine Wesley's eyes to have turned into.

~~~

"Wesley? You coming down?" Sarah calls from behind my bedroom door causing me to knock over the lemongrass scented soap-filled dispenser from the sink.

"Ugh..." I quickly glance at the mirror to see that my eyes are still a bluish-red color. "I-I think I'm getting a headache."

"Oh, well I can get you some Tylenol from the downstairs bathroom." Sarah's muffled voice offers.

"No!" I shout before stepping out of the bathroom and standing in front of my door, making sure she doesn't try to come in. "I mean I'll just sleep it off."

"Okay... well, I guess I'll go to bed too. Goodnight, Wes."

I could hear the dismay in her voice and it kills me, but what else am I supposed to do? After a few seconds, I hear her footsteps become fainter as she walks away.

I quickly lock my door and begin to rub my eyelids furiously as I walk in front of the mirror. I take a deep breath before lifting my head to see two sapphires that bleed into rubies greeting me in the reflection.

I begin to hyperventilate, my knuckles turning white as my grip onto the sink tightens. I try to focus on breathing as I close my eyes.

"Come on, Wes. Come on." I mutter. "Just breath."

After a few minutes, I'm able to get my breathing back to normal but I know as soon as I look in the mirror I would lose control again. Focus, Wes. What does Scott do to control it?

My mind immediately drifts to Allison and today at the ice-skating rink. I focus on all the times I've been happier because of her. Because of the way she helps me feel like me again. Because I love her.

I slowly look up, seeing my new sapphire and fiery red eyes slowly fade into my father's blue eyes.

~~~

I erratically pace around my room—my hands placed on top of my head—before sitting on the edge of my bed, my leg bouncing up and down while I begin to bite my nails as I continue to come up with various reasons as to why this is happening.

Derek. It has to be Derek. Maybe that dream wasn't actually a dream. Maybe he really did bite me. That's the only thing I could think of. Maybe I'm whatever Lydia is. Maybe I'm something entirely different. All I know is that it's his fault.

My thoughts are halted as my alarm clock begins to blare. I look behind me to see the time is 7:30. Had I really stayed up all night? I didn't even notice the sun coming up with all of the thoughts clouding my head.

I get up and walk to the mirror to see my eyes are red, not because they're a different color, but because they're bloodshot with slight bags under them.

I walk away and grab the bomber jacket Lydia had bought me along with my backpack before walking out the door. I charge down the stairs, grabbing my extra set of keys, and head outside.

Sarah needs the car today and I don't feel like I could talk to Stiles right now, so I begin to walk to school.

I have no idea where Derek is, but I know someone who does.

~~~

After twenty minutes of walking and plotting, I arrive at Beacon Hills High. I notice Allison stepping out of her blue Mazda in the parking lot so I do what I do best. Blend in. I know I should probably tell everyone what's happening but there is already so much going on and I don't want to add to the problems.