My Guardian Angel (Angel!Link x Religious!Reader Oneshots) PART 2

Samhainophobia

Note: The term can be traced back to the Celtic word 'samhain', meaning All Hallow's Eve.

Your POV

I have a fear of Halloween and I get nightmares a lot ever since when I was a kid. The darkness...like it swallowed me into the abyss. Terrifying images of inner demons screeched loudly inside my brain and I panicked.

I was scared to death, afraid of scary horror movies that made my mind went unconscious. My skin turned pale, numb and sweaty because I can't even control my tension. I cried and cried as my heart begins to increase rapidly.

I have some kind of GAD (general anxiety disorder). I am timid, freaked out and frightened when I see masks that looked so real....like the movies. And yes, I'm afraid of the dark and everything. It's going to eat my brain!!

I shuddered, my body went cold as ice. I don't want to face my fears! I just can't! I grabbed a brown paper bag and take deep shaky breaths escaped from my mouth, shivers down to my spine. Ugh, I don't care about that! I'm such a total scaredy cat!

Then, I kept my eyes shut tightly and ears covered in my hands, trying to prevent all the horrible loud noises from outside. It's unbearable torture for me and it's awful. I bawled out in tears over and over, trying to get rid of this horrid pain.

Of course, it's a Halloween holiday but I don't know why I get scared all the time and I hate going outside. When I try to go out, I hid my face with a plain mask. Not terrifying nor a masquerade. Just a white one with a sad expression, add a little touch of blue teardrops.

Well, everybody's going out wearing in costumes for trick-or-treating and have lots of fun today....except for me. Of all the emotions I've ever felt this way, are now replaced with fear, mixed with shock and sadness.

Great....when I'm in public, people are cold-stared at me with suspicious looks. Disgust, make fun of me and mad glares here and there. Also, I wasn't wearing a costume but a dark emo fashion. The plain-looking mask is the only one that keeps me safe.

What's more is it shields me from my darkest fears that haunts me, like the monsters under my bed or in my closet. I have nothing to protect myself....I feel weak and helpless. I just don't have the courage to fight back.

I suddenly get paranoid, like I was suffering from schizophrenia. I coped up with grief and holiday depression. I was treated as a nobody. The only thing to cure my troubles is getting caught while I stand in front of the cool rain or watch the autumn leaves fall.

My own world is shattered and filled with denial. My fears have gotten really worse, stabs my heart with daggers and my head hurts painfully. I don't mind about the coldness....but I seemed to like it. Imagine if a huge blossom tree that shelters me, my secret safe haven.

Nobody love me. No one seems to care about me. Nobody there to fight back my fears or stood up to me when I get bullied. No one give me comfort. No nothing....people thinks that I was suffered from samhainophobia. Which means afraid of Halloween horrors.

Some kind of a ritual cult? If that's the right answer, it's not going to make me happy anymore and this is a stupid holiday! None of this would happen to my scars if I wasn't existed. Why am I so afraid of? I can't explain why or how...my life goes downhill this year.

Where am I supposed to go? Well, the outside world sure is scary. I wished for a peaceful place where I can be secured from temptation, to protect me from harm. No more scars, no more horrors or tears...but full of happiness, joy and nostalgia that can fix my frightened heart, put all its pieces back together.

There's got to be a better way to find a cure. I'm just a bit nervous and tense. Even though I have samhainophobia, if there's no one will help me, then I'll go out there and find a path on my own. No matter what dangers I might face.