Jasper x Fem! Reader (NOT FINISHED, may continue at a later date)

Chapter 36: Depression

Mini A/N – 'Monday' ended up turning into 'Wednesday'...😭 I'm sorry peeps! But I have it for you today. I skipped over class work to write this chapter so you better be grateful! I'm just joking 😂 enjoy!

⚠️ WARNING ⚠️ This chapter has some triggering themes!

       You laid in bed processing what happened a little over a week ago. The house was completely dark, the drapes in Jasper's room shut tight. The bedroom door was wide open, allowing you to see into the pitch-black hallway of your home — or house, you should say. It was nothing but an empty shell of walls and floor now. You would no longer hear the soft tapping of Storm's paws across the hardwood floor, or the heavy thumping of Jasper's footsteps coming down the stairs. You would no longer feel Storm's furry body against your calves whenever she'd circle your feet or Jasper's warm embrace. You would no longer see Storm's lively seafoam green eyes or Jasper's piercing amber ones.
It was eerily quiet, the sound of the ocean waves crashing against each other infiltrating your ears from outside. You were lying on your back, your fingers laced and hands resting limply over your stomach. You stared at the ceiling blankly, not knowing what to do with yourself. You had not left the house since last Saturday when you had seen Jasper for the first and final time again, along with your kitten. Your heart ached for both of them, but you at least had enough sanity left to know that you would never see one of them again. The hope you had for Jasper was slowly dropping day by day, leaving you feeling more and more empty. You sighed, rolling over onto your side in the quartz's sheets. You pulled the covers partially over your face, closing your eyes as you inhaled deeply. An earthy scent with peppery undertones clouded your senses, but not nearly long enough. Still smells like her, you thought, your eyes burning from the tears threatening to fall. Your throat felt tight from the emotion, making you gasp slightly. Your body trembled as you moved your arms to hug yourself, squeezing your sides tightly. The skin along your wrists burned, and so did your abdomen, but you ignored the pain. The physical pain was nothing compared to the emotional torture. You whimpered, curling up into a fetal position as you continued to dig your nails into your flesh. "I'm okay — it's okay" you reassured softly, shutting your eyes tight. "I'm okay..." You repeated the phrase to yourself until you fell asleep, gripping the bedsheets as a pitiful form of comfort.

*time skip brought to you by 'Gem Harvest'*

You were awoken by the sound of someone knocking on your door. You sat up slowly, sliding your hand towards the nightstand next to Jasper's bed. You slipped your phone from the surface, turning it on. You winced at the bright light, averting your eyes for a moment before blinking. 2:53 PM. You inhaled deeply, exhaling slowly as the sound of knuckles against your front door reached your ears again. You sluggishly moved from under the covers, out of the bedroom, and then down the stairs. You dragged your feet against the hardwood floor until you were face to face with the door. You cracked it open, squinting your (e/c) eyes against the sunlight that shined in them. "What", you said groggily, looking down at the two gems that stood in front of you. Peridot gave a nervous smile, rocking on her heels as she glanced at Amethyst.
"Garnet told us to come and fetch you", the quartz said, pushing some of her pale, lavender hair behind her ear.
"For", you asked bluntly, pulling the door open wider to lean against the frame. Amethyst averted her indigo eyes from your (e/c) ones, a small blush spreading across her cheeks. You were confused by her reaction at first before realizing you weren't wearing anything but a sports bra and a pair of boyshorts. You smirked softly, cocking your head to the side, silently urging her to answer your question.
"The Garnet wants you to participate in the small...celebration we are having", Peridot said slowly, smiling up at you when she finished. You chuckled softly, running your fingers through your (h/l) hair.
"I'd rather not. I have...things to do."
"No, you don't." You glanced up to see Garnet come around the corner of your house, adjusting her visors. You gave a soft sigh, crossing your arms loosely.
"Fine. I just don't want to go", you said stubbornly.
"It'll be good for you to get some sun", the fusion countered, walking up to your porch steps. She approached you slowly, stopping in front of you. You looked up at her, a frown across your lips. Garnet lowered her shades, revealing her eyes to you. You groaned, throwing your head back in frustration. The fusion chuckled before squeezing your face in one of her hands. "Go and get dressed. I'll wait for you." You stood there for a moment, glaring at the floor. I could always refuse again. There's no way she can — You screamed upon being lifted in the air, gripping onto the person who had thrown you over their shoulder. Garnet slammed the front door shut with her foot, leaving a wide-eyed Peridot and Amethyst outside. "I could tell you were thinking about refusing, but I'm not giving you a choice right now." You huffed as the fusion walked up the stairs, bringing you into your room. She plopped you down onto your bed, sitting next to you on the mattress. Her weight caused the bed to dip slightly, making your body slide in her direction. "Go on. I said I'd wait for you." You sighed again before standing to your feet to get the articles of clothing needed. Laundry needs to be done, you thought, closing your dresser drawers. You then shuffled into the bathroom, closing the door behind you so that you could get in the shower. You peeled your clothes off, throwing them off to the side before carefully removing your bandages. You had taken your stitches out yourself a little over a week ago and surprisingly did a pretty good job. They did leave a scar that ran up your abdomen, but it was barely visible. You still had some gel leftover in the tube the nurse had given you the day you left the hospital, and you planned to use it until it was all gone. You let out a content sigh, throwing away the used gauze before turning the shower water on. You waited for it to get hot before stepping in, letting the water run down your face and back. Maybe I might have fun after all. I haven't seen the gems in a while so maybe Garnet is right... You sighed again, grabbing the shower gel and your towel to begin cleaning yourself up.