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CHANGES

Many people often say "I'll change".  Most people, when they get mad on someone, they tell them  "You need to change".

Have you ever wondered how many days, weeks, months or even years it takes for a person to change?

The fact is, there is no answer to that. You might have heard this somewhere, but change varies in people.  I want to use this chapter to share with you how a change in attitude made me a better and the best version of myself in middle school .

As I mentioned earlier in the previous chapter, I failed in the BECE qualification test. This was the qualification test for final (senior) year students in middle school to determine whether they were ready to write the final big exam to go to high school.

It was a point in my life  where I fell right in my own trap. There was nothing or nobody that could get me out of the situation but myself. I was a lost child then. I did not even know where to begin and how to get through with everything that was going on.

1'Apology'. 

I learned to apologize for my mistakes to the people I offended. Sincerely, I said to my teachers "I'm sorry for disrespecting you in your class Miss/Sir". I apologized to them because I needed to fix the relationship I had with the teachers. Before, I was a dumb young girl thinking I needed no help from those teachers, I had everything and was good on my own. The morbid truth was that I was wrong. I needed the teachers to help me. I needed them to explain to me things I did not understand in the various subjects. I needed teachers to advise me on how to learn at home. I needed teachers to recommend me the kind of books to read and questions to solve to prepare for my exams.

I am being very honest here, readers. I needed my teachers so much.

This is why I had to apologize and show them that I truly regretted all the wrongs I had done to them. The procedure worked. The teachers accepted my apologies. Some of them took long to accept, but still did in the end. I could finally fix the broken relationship with my teachers.

2. Honesty

It was very essential. I had to be honest about my weakness in studies and behavior. I had to be honest to everyone around me of what I could not do and that I needed help. Swallowing my ugly pride, I asked for help from the intelligent students in the higher class to help me with my studies. Being honest to myself like "hey. Right now you are failing. You are not getting the best grades. You aren't doing enough so wake up".  This was one of the most important things I needed as a tool to change. Fortunately, it helped me a lot.

3.Consistency

This was the key. Staying consistent with everything I do. It was a task for me to learn after school, so I did it consistently, day after day. It was a task for me to get up early in the morning and get to school to get time to revise with my science teacher. I could have chosen to sleep longer. But I did not. I decided to stay consistent with my daily schedules. When it was my duty to stay consistent with my changed behaviors. It was my duty for me to stay up late and study, not just for one night but every night. I had to continue doing what I decided to do to help me change. To help me become a better student, a better person and the best version of myself.

4. Sacrifice

I had to do this. I had to give up on my television shows. I had to quit spending time on instagram checking how many followers I gained and lost. I had to stop chitchatting with friends. I had to sacrifice my time spent on unneeded things for the sake of something better. At that point, getting out of the "dummy class" was my better place. Erasing people's negative thoughts about my ability was a better place for me. Getting out of middle school with good grades and having my parents proud was a better place for me. To achieve them, sacrificing the petty things did not feel as difficult as I always thought it would.

Human beings are all created differently. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. We all have good and bad sides. We all have things about ourselves we wish we could change. I believe that changes aren't always necessary. They are sometimes made for the wrong purposes. They are again, sometimes done for the sake of wrong people.

I needed to change. I needed to change because the initial girl was not the person I wanted to be for the rest of my life. That girl was not helping me become better. She was making me uglier and uglier. I disliked that truth. So I needed to change.

As terrible as it might sound, I needed that girl to disappear, and she did. She no longer exists in the world I am in.