13 walking to 19

HIGH SCHOOL (SHS)

High school, a dramatic yet amazing place packed with teenagers of different personalities, intentions and stories. I had my own story, I knew I was different. It was hard saying goodbye to the amazing friends I made in middle school (JHS) but it was certainly time for all of us to move on and start over.

High school was completely different. There were too many faces and most of them didn't seem pleased at all. On my first day, I got punished for something I can't recall. One thing I do remember is the scary looks on almost all the teachers in the entire school. They glared at me as though I had been on the 'notorious students list' for years but it hadn't even been a week since I got there. Cute guys, rich kids, popular couples and strict seniors. Middle school's disciplinary committee was nothing compared to High School's reality.

I wasn't able to attend the school's orientation for form 1 students (freshman in high school) so I barely knew anyone. I was unaware of those boring rules and regulations which I disobeyed throughout my stay in the school . My only intention at that time was to achieve good grades, graduate peacefully and enter university. I just wanted to be successful and make my parents proud. Drama with girls or entanglements with boys were the last things I needed.

It is high school after all. Things happen and people change. I still wanted to make friends and explore so when I first walked in the class, I made sure I had a big smile on my face. I thought smiles were somehow chances for new friendships. I introduced myself to about 6,7 girls who were sitting near me. Stella was the first girl I spoke to in the class and she is still my closest friend today. My class had only 13 girls and 30 boys. This meant the boys were always 'vibing'. Most of the boys in my class seemed and sounded different from the boys I knew in middle school. Boys in high school  were noisier and full of themselves.

The funniest thing about the first day was how everyone knew everyone from other people.  People were telling me all sort of stories about people in the school I barely knew. "She's with him, don't get close to him", "that guy's a fool, don't let him talk to you" or "that girl only wants to be your friend because you are a mixed race". I wondered if I was also talked about somewhere and if I was, what it would be about. I had quite a weird reputation in middle school so it would not be surprising if people I didn't know knew of me. All the students in that school were required to have their hair trimmed short. I was feeling quite devastated the whole week because I had my long hair trimmed. I thought looked terrible with my hair gone. High school was a place of rumor and eyes. Even I, the retired "attention wanting girl"  could not fit in at some point. I feared fame and people. High school taught me not to consider people I know as "friends". High school taught me real friendship and made me think of life in different ways. Nonetheless, I still made mistakes and became someone I would not be proud to show people today, if I didn't change but the experiences made me who I am now so I am grateful regardless. 

I can not count the number of times I thought of leaving the school because I got tired and bewildered. There were days I pretended to be sick so that I can take off from school because I couldn't stop caring about people's opinions and how they saw me. High school is an amazing place indeed in both good and bad ways.There were teachers who held me through out my 3 year stay and friends who genuinely supported me whenever I got weak.

The next few chapters will be based on the things I went through there and how I surprisingly graduated in spite of everything. Stay connected and take a sip of my cup of teen tea !