Not so little anymore

Goodbye

Okay, I lied. NOW including this one there will only be three chapters left. I was planning on combining this chapter with the last one, but I realized that would probably make it just a bit too long. So I separated them. I hope you enjoy this next chapter!
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Maya had thought all about Simon's words to her as she and Riley took the subway and walked towards the Matthew's apartment for Josh's party. Riley had told her it would give them some time to really talk about some things instead of having to carpool with their family. Riley could see that Maya needed to get some things off her chest.

"Sounds like he just gave you some tough love to me." Riley stated as she and Maya rounded the corner of the street that her old childhood home was on. Maya sighed as she shoved her hands deeper into her leather jacket pockets and they kept walking.

"I just thought that Simon would have jumped at the opportunity to stay near me tonight at Josh's party. I know you and the others would just try and push me into talking to him." Maya told her. Riley looked at her best friend with a frown on her face.

"You know Maya, Simon is right. It really would have been a crappy move to bring him to Josh's party." Riley told her. Maya groaned.

"Look, its not like I want to hurt Josh. I just want to avoid him, as much as I possibly can. I-" Maya cut her self off as she felt a lump in her throat come up, and she swallowed hard. "I cant face him tonight." She whispered, finishing off her sentence.

"Why? What's keeping you from talking to him tonight?" Riley asked her. Maya looked up at her as they got to the front door of the apartment building. "You're the one that told him to leave, to take the job. How are you the one that's not able to face him?" Maya didnt answer right off.

"I just cant, Riley." Maya answered. Riley glanced at her as they walked to the elevator and pushed the up arrow button.

"You cant keep running from this, Maya. You feel the way you do now, and Josh gets on that plane tomorrow, you may regret it." Riley told her.

"Stop!" Maya snapped. Riley looked over at her with wide eyes, she had never really snapped at Riley like that before. "Look, I've heard it, alright? Everyone! You, Farkle, Simon, Lucas and even Zay! I get it, you guys think I'm making a big mistake letting Josh go!" Maya vented.

"So then why are you not listening?" Riley asked her with her eyes narrowed. Maya let out a frustrated sigh.

"Because I'm not going to be the reason Josh wakes up ten years from now and realizes that he let that dream fly out the window. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if he resented and hated me for holding him back. This isn't about me, this was never about me, Riley! I'd rather be miserable if it meant that he's happy!"

"He's happy with you!" Riley argued with her.

"For now. Until he wakes up one day and realizes there is something better."

"Josh is not your dad, Maya!"

"I never said he was!"

"Then you should stop treating him like he is!" Riley rounded on her and glared. "Josh loves you, he loves you more than anything or anyone else. Sometimes I think you just dont want to be loved, and that's why you're pushing him away." Maya took a visual step back. Her eyes wide as she felt like Riley just slapped her in the face.

"You have no idea what you're talking about." Maya shook her head at him.

"Dont I?" The elevator door opened and they both hesitantly stepped into it and let the doors close behind them. "Why cant you just accept that there is someone who is willing to give up everything to be with you? Why cant you see that Josh actually loves you and cares about you enough to throw everything out the window to be with you. You're lucky, Maya. That type of love doesnt come often anymore."