sat by the ocean

destroy me

I want the intensity and the loudness and the chaos
and I wanna feel so much that it takes over everything I've worked so hard to build

I just wanna
I just wanna destroy me

can somebody
can somebody destroy me

I wanna, I wanna
destroy me
take my heart and rip it apart,
I'll grow a new one

I wanna,
I just wanna destroy me
take my brain and get rid of it,
so I can make a new one

I want and I want and I want
hungrily, greedily, needily
oh, I'm so needy
won't you set me on fire?

you don't get it,
you don't get it

it's not the way I am
it feels wrong
I am wrong,
I am right,
but it's wrong

destroy me
so that I can come back
and love love love love love

I am an engine built of pure energy
pure energy
pure energy
pure energy

baby, I can't do this
not to me
I'm all I've got

baby, I can't do this anymore
hold the gun to my head so I can knock it away
I wanna prove I'm alive
I'm alive I'm alive I'm alive as fuck
but why doesn't it feel that way?

I think my heart stopped beating again
but I always wanna prove that I'm not gonna die
because I'm not that, not that, not that

anything but that

oh, please, gods, anything but that

please don't do it to me
please don't make me

Alice Alice Alice
how did you do it?
Dear, dear, dear Dorothy,
what's it take to make you stop screaming?

Cheshire,
madman,
white rabbit,
evils within me,
take me away take me away take me away

why won't you do it already?

let me see something else for a change.

burn me alive
shatter me tenderly
don't kill me, just ressurect me
sweetie, I'm already gone

I went too far
and now I'm stuck out at sea
in this little sailboat
with my past in front of me

why can't I just fucking grow?
is there some magical solution?
I want a new brain, mind, heart, feeling, energy

why won't you just give me it?
show me the way to get it?
just tell me one direction
and I'll spring for it

I just wanna destroy me
force my mind to feel right
because nothing is wrong
and that isn't right