Four am

Chapter five

"Hey Zoe" my mom says as she's leaning against the door frame. "How's it going?"

"It alright" I say lying because I have no idea what I'm even reading and I've just been studying for the past 2 hours ok maybe studying for an hour and scrolling through Tik Tok.

"That's good" She smiles. "I wanted to ask you something."

"What's up." I say nervously because I am overthinking about this. Why does she need to ask me, are we moving, does she want me to change schools, stop dancing.

"So there's this young girl. She's 9 years old, her name is Charlie. She has leukaemia and she recently got transferred from the kids hospital in Boston. I met her the other day and she told me that she wants to become a ballerina when she's older. I told her all about you, and she wants to meet you."

"Yeah of course mom, I would love to!"

"Maybe you could also dance for her, in the gym at the hospital?" My mom asks unsure.

"I would love to. I can meet her on Sunday if that's ok, as well as bringing Adri and Leah?" I ask, tilting my head and smiling.

"Sounds great, goodnight I'm headed to bed."

"Night."

I can't study anymore, none of this is making sense. I'm going to take yet another break, my favourite thing to do when I have a lot on my mind is to sit outside at night and just look at the stars. It's the best feeling in the entire world looking up at the stars you just forget about everything and lose yourself in the stars. You look at something bigger than yourself. If you think of it we're so small in comparison to everything in universe. Stars, the sun, another galaxy. 

I don't know how it started just sitting outside at night not talking just living in the moment, Leah thinks it's the weirdest thing though.

I'm trying to sneak down stairs as quietly as possible even though it's only 10. My mom is probably fast asleep, she had a long day at the hospital today. Dad caught a red-eye and Maddie is of course in her room probably face-timing 4 different boys. Cole. Wait where is Cole? Probably at another party sticking his tongue down a girl's throat.

I'm trying to find the north star, first you need to find the Big Dipper, then notice a line from the two outermost stars in the bowl of the Big Dipper which lead you to Polaris, also known as the north star. The brightest star in the constellation of Ursa Minor. Yes I like stars and constellations and yes I do read my monthly horoscope.

As I'm just laying there, I hear something coming from the bushes honestly if there's a kidnapper I would literally beg them to take me. I know, I know that sounds morbid and what not but honestly it would fix my problems... okay maybe it wouldn't fix them but at least I would be able to avoid them. I see a shadow trying to jump over our 9 foot fence, I would like to see them try. I just closed my eyes and focused on relaxing. 

Then I heard a loud thump, what the fuck is going on I just want to lay out here in peace but no some fucking asshole has to try and break into my fucking house.

"Peanut." I hear a familiar voice say.

Keeping my eyes closed I turned my head in a very slow and dramatic why and opening my eyes once I'm facing him.

"Yes?"

"What are you doing out here so late?"

"I could be asking you the same thing now, why are you jumping the fence? You know you could have gone through the front door right?"

"It was locked," He says in an annoyed tone.

"Then why didn't you call me?"

"I called you 15 times, you didn't answer." He says, showing me his phone. I squinted my eyes because his phone screen was too bright.