Torn between Love and Hate

Twenty

Dara and Donghae were unaware of people taking pictures of them as they continued their little picnic. She is still not sure on how to go about telling Donghae about Jiyong. She's afraid that he might not accept it and she would lose him. But she knows that she has to tell him somehow.

"Donghae. I...I have something to tell you. You might hate me after you hear it but please hear me out first and try to listen to me." Dara paused for a moment as she took a deep breath. "You see...I'm...now mar...married." She saw Donghae's shocked facial expression and how hard he is struggling to keep it together. Tears started forming in her eyes but she's holding it in. "Donghae... I'm sorry. Please listen to me first. My marriage is an arranged one."

Donghae definitely lost it. He got up and started pacing back and forth. He is aware that they are in a public place and he cannot really react properly to what she was telling him. He started cleaning up and putting away all the stuff back in the basket that he brought with them.

Dara was dumbfounded but she understand how he is feeling and is also aware of their location. Together and quietly they went back to his car. She had nervously waited for him inside the car as he put the basket in the trunk of the car. When he got in, he started the car without looking at her as anger is forming inside of him. They drove in silence for a few minutes but Donghae hit the steering wheel so hard with his right fist and roughly pulled over in a place where he knows nobody can interrupt them.

Silence...more silence.

Dara was rubbing her hands together really hard as her habit for being too nervous. Donghae noticed this and finally decided to hold her hands. Dara was dumbfounded at first but when he looked at Donghae her heart broke. She is now realizing that she really does love him and don't want to lose him.

"Okay. I will listen carefully this time and I will try not to jump into conclusions." Donghae quietly said.

Dara cleared her throat before speaking. "My mom has a close friend who also has a son close to my age. They treat each other as sisters and had always wanted to be a family but because of some incidents they were separated. They haven't seen each other for more than ten years ever since my mom moved her in the US. A common friend of theirs took a vacation here and accidentally met my mother and that is how they were reunited. My mom's friend and her family has some business here in America and decided to also make it as their mini vacation. We finally met with them and they were both ecstatic that their children are close in age. I guess that was how it all started because ever since then they have been in contact with each other. I was sixteen then and he was eighteen when we first met. It wasn't until about a couple of years ago when my mom and her friend finally decided to pair us up together. Of course I wasn't for it and I also heard that he also wasn't for it. So our parents gave us free time to think about it for six months which turned to a year." Dara paused as she looked at Donghae who is now staring out ahead as he listened while his left fingers is close to his lips.

"A couple of years ago you said. Aren't we still together then?" Donghae asked.

Dara shook her head. "That was the same night that my mom told me about it after we had our talk."

Donghae gasped as he remembered that night and he left her the following day to go to Europe. They did not communicate for months after he left. Every time they got a chance to talk it was very short because of the time difference. He felt like they have grown farther away from each other. There were even times that they don't talk at all. That's why seeing her in South Korea was a big surprise for both of them. He suddenly turned to her.

"When we saw each other in South Korea, you were with...w...was that him?" Donghae slowly asked.

Dara nodded as her head was shook down. "We had just gotten married then." She added.

Donghae was dumbfounded and found himself getting agitated as his anger is building up. "Why? Why did you not tell me any of this sooner? You know how many times I have called you? Each time not once did you ever pick up and talk to me." He started raising his voice though he knows that there's nothing he can do about it now. "You know how much I loved you. I still love you." He quietly whispered but Dara still was able to hear him, the more her heart broke.

She faced him and could see how much he is hurting. "D...Donghae. I'm sorry."

"Do you love him?" He suddenly asked.

Dara froze for a bit. Then Donghae took her silence as a "Yes". He turned around and about to re-start the car when he heard her say.

"No. I don't love him." It was Donghae's turn to freeze. She then continued. "O...our marriage is only temporary. We made an agreement that we will stay married for a year only. After that we will get a divorce."

Donghae was dumbfounded and at the same time felt hopeful. "What do you mean temporary? Aren't you living together under one roof?" Donghae furrowed his brows as he asked her for clarification.

Dara then turned to him again. "Yes. W...we are but I have my own room and he has his own. We don't sleep together like what ever you are thinking." She whispered the last sentence.

Donghae placed his forefinger below her chin so that they could look at each other. "D...did you ever slept with him?"

Confused as she remembered their wedding night. She saw Donghae's hurtful reaction. "No. Nothing happened between us. We are completely stranger to each other." She said with conviction.

Donghae slowly studied her face before taking her lips to his. They have kissed as if all the pain will washed out in itself. They both took a breather. But Donghae kept her close as their forehead are against each other. "I still love you and I will wait until the day you get a divorced." Dara could only nod happily.

"Promise me that we will continue to communicate with each other no matter what." Donghae asked and Dara nodded as she gave him a smile.

She then told him about Jiyong and her agreements. Donghae promised to wait for her and will at times visit her in SoKor.