Let the Light In

Chapter 6: Privation

Chapter 6: Privation

Three days.

It had been three days since Leia had told Rey about R2's activity.

Three days since she and Poe had sat down to their second game of pazaak.

Three days since Poe had, in fact, gone to fetch that bottle of Corellian Whiskey, and they had spent the rest of the day playing pazaak for shots, taking refuge from the mutual memory of Kylo Ren.

Three days since Chewie had helped Rey stagger back to the Falcon and fall into bed.

But more importantly, it had been three days since there had been any activity over the bond at all.

Needless to say, Rey didn't get much time to mull over this fact. Chewie had kept her busy with Shyriiwook and holochess, and Leia had been systematically running Rey through a myriad of medical examinations to ensure she was in top shape after the events of Starkiller.

Her physicals all came back spotless, if not a bit malnourished, but her mental examination had been, well-

"A mess."

That.

Leia had Rey seated in her living quarters, and the General herself was standing with her hands firmly on her hips, looking at Rey with an almost motherly disapproval. Rey had been here for almost an hour, and Leia was nothing if not persistent.

"Rey, I'm more than aware of the toll that such events can have on a person, and I know we're in the middle of a war and everything, but you can't expect to be fine just brushing off everything like you do."

Rey shrugged, "I didn't have much room to wiggle on Jakku, I'm sure you can imagine. Any show of weakness would have made me easy prey."

"I know, Rey. I know. The past is for you to deal with and I won't pretend to have all the answers. All I'm asking is that you try and talk to someone about what's happening. I tell all my men, if they can't acknowledge what's bothering them, they can't fly a fighter or fire a blaster. Having issues that cloud your mind put yourself as well as others in danger. That might have been all good and well for solitary life on Jakku, but here I'm going to need you to at least think about it." There was no harshness in Leia's voice. Only concern, and the lilt it had on her speech reminded Rey of Kylo. He definitely got most of his genes from his mother.

Oh frack it! Rey swore at herself. Did her thoughts honestly have to wander there?

"I do think about it! That's the problem!" She retorted, letting her frustration get the better of her, "I think about it all the time and it's driving me insane."

Leia sat down for the first time since she had brought Rey in, and she let Rey vent.

"The sudden change from hot desert to cold space. Lonely and afraid, to friends and slightly-less-afraid. Non Force-User to suddenly-" She choked over her own words, stopping herself short of saying something really damning, "-s-suddenly making Stormtroopers do what I tell them," she finished quickly, and hoped Leia hadn't noticed the wobble.

Who was Rey kidding? Of course the perceptive General had noticed, but she was also privy to know when to press, and this was not one of those times.

"Leia," Rey continued slowly, "I just want to find Luke and get some measure of control over whatever is happening to me. I was fine on Jakku. I was fine on Takodana. Sure, I was struggling, but I was fine-"