38 | Jealousy and Deception

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Buttoning up my white collared shirt and slipping on my blue denim jacket to make my outfit less formal, I step outside of my room and am met with the sweet smell of my mom's freshly baked cinnamon rolls

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Buttoning up my white collared shirt and slipping on my blue denim jacket to make my outfit less formal, I step outside of my room and am met with the sweet smell of my mom's freshly baked cinnamon rolls.

Taking in the sweet smell of the air, I close my eyes to enjoy the feeling before strolling casually into the kitchen to find my mother slaving over her latest baking creation.

"They smell amazing, mom!" I praise her, licking my lower lip instinctively as I look at the delicious food.

Her head tilts up to meet my eyes as her smile grows in response to my praise. She's always so happy, my mother, never a dull cloud in her perfectly blue sky.

I wish I could relate, but unfortunately my life is filled with stress over dance drama and guys that don't like me back.

"Thank you, darling, I made them for you and Charlie to have as a snack before your date," she states, licking the white icing from her finger before placing two of the cinnamon treats in a little Tupperware container for me.

My mom is so caring, she's always so supportive of everything I do and I'm honestly so grateful for her. Even when I came out both her and my dad accepted me straight away, without any hesitation at all, and that only made me love them more.

Handing me the container, I fold it under my arm as I check my phone to see if Charlie is outside yet. We decided to go to a restaurant for some food, I'm dressed in black jeans with a white button down shirt and denim jacket, smart casual as I like to say.

I've never been to this restaurant before so I wanted to dress appropriately, not too formal but not too underdressed either, I wanted to show Charlie that I'm trying to make an effort.

I need to make an effort, it's what we both deserve.

Even though I may have spent the entire hour that I was getting ready thinking about West and how much I'd love to go on a date with him, I need to put that behind me now and concentrate on the man who actually wants to be with me.

It's a perfect timing really, he saved me from having a breakdown over the twitching pain in my ankle yesterday, which still hasn't really recovered completely, but he's also here to save me right now, as I hear the doorbell ring.

"Have fun, darling. I can't wait to hear all about it," my mom encourages a smile from me as she pulls me into a tight embrace, kissing my cheek before pulling away and wiping a tear from her cheek.

She's very emotional today, it's the first official date that I've ever been on, I think she's just proud that I feel comfortable enough to put myself out there without fear of judgement.

That couldn't be further from the truth, the only reason why I felt able to even ask Charlie on this date was because I was channeling my inner West, I owe this all to him really, but I need to get him out of my mind.

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