The Suburbs

Chapter twenty-eight Jacob's POV

Jacob's POV -

It's taken me all day to get everything that I wanted to for Mia prepared. I had to go shopping in places I've never been before, into little quirky trinket shops and pretty much anywhere with home written on the sign. It took me hours but I wanted to get as close to the real deal as I possibly could.

Mia opened up to me about her close relationship with her dad and how thoughtfully he would comfort her and cheer her up when she really needed it and how it would always start with a mug of hot chocolate.
Her dad would make it on the hob with Cornish milk and then pour it into an extra large red teapot so that Mia could refill as much as she wanted.
Then he'd put out a wooden tray filled with marshmallows, cream, sprinkles and chocolate buttons that she got to decorate her drink with.

I have no idea what makes a hot drink so magic but I do know it made Mia feel so safe. And she misses it desperately. When she mentions her dad I can see the ache behind her eyes and the shift in her demeanour. I want to try, somehow, to recreate the warmth he gave her. I want her to feel safe.

My palms are sweating as I arrange everything out on the kitchen counter. I have never done anything like this before. I have never wanted to do anything like this either. Elle always wanted the same thing, she wanted to be whisked to the most expensive restaurant I could find, presented with a new piece of jewellery from Tiffany or Cartier and she wanted to take at least five photos during our evening to share them all on her social media.

Whereas Mia is more intricate. Sure, she'd be grateful for any gift I could offer her, but when she speaks about her life, her face lights up at memories and the moments and not all the materialistic stuff we're influenced to buy.
I think that's my favourite thing of all. I love the way she sees the world and her place in it and when I'm with her I feel like I have that vision too.

These thoughts have me buckled under the realisation over how quickly these feelings came for her. I've never felt this way and honestly I didn't expect to. She went from being the hot girl next door that I occasionally fantasised about fucking to the one thing I need the most to get me through the day. All I think about is the day I can get out of this web of lies and be with her openly and happily. I now fantasise more about all the places I want to take her, all the moments I want to experience with her just so I can make her smile. I want to live my life the way I should always have. With the right person.

If I have to give up everything for this then I will. If Elle wants the house, half my money, all my cars, then fuck it, she can have it. As long as she signs those papers and allows this escapade to finally end, I'll do whatever she wants.
I'll take all the blame. I'll tell the family that it was my fault, that I couldn't be the man she needed or wanted out of life. I'll move out, I won't let this disrupt her life. I'll move hours away from here if I have too, if it makes her happy enough to let me go without a fight.
But as these thoughts come I have a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. I think a fight is exactly what I will have. It's not me she won't want to lose as such, but it's this lifestyle. That and the fact that divorce is practically a swear word for her people. Divorce equals failure for her and I know she'll struggle to see it any other way.

***

A subtle knock sounds against my front door, I barely hear it over the heavy rain that's been battering against my windows for the last hour. She's earlier than expected but I don't care, I'm ready for her. I'm ready to spend the next few days enjoying her.

I rush across the entrance hall ready for her to fall into me and wrap her arms tightly around me. But that hope fades the second I lay my eyes on her.

"Mia?" I ask, concerned.

Her eyes are puffy, she looks like she's been crying for hours, her arms are folded against her chest and her head slightly dropped down as if she's ready to defend herself or apologise for something. I'm not sure which but either way I have a bad feeling. Her soft blonde hair is dripping wet and her mascara has smudged around her perfectly green eyes.

"Can we talk?" She finally croaks, her voice sounding strained and exhausted.

"You're soaked...what's going on?" I grab hold of her arm and gently guide her in towards me so I can wrap my arms around her to keep her warm. She doesn't embrace me like I thought she would but she hasn't pushed me away either.

"I'm fine. I just went for a little walk before I came over. I just needed a minute to myself that's all."

I want to ask her why the hell she went walking in this weather but I decide it's best not to.

She takes a step back and wipes the rain from her face and pushes her hair back anxiously as I grab a towel from the downstairs cupboard and throw it around her shoulders.

"O-Kay?" I gently question, confused.

Mia leads the way into the kitchen and I follow behind. My body suddenly filled with uncertainty and dread. She barely made eye contact with me at the door and she's shivering a little, at first I thought she was cold from the rain but as I look at her closely I think it's nerves. Which scares the hell out of me.

Suddenly, a gasp falls from her lips as she's stopped dead in her tracks and just staring motionless at the counter.

"What's this?" She whispers as her bottom lip quivers and her eyes effortlessly fill with tears.

"Well...it was supposed to be a surprise. Something to make you smile." I answer honestly as her eyes gaze over the special mug I got her and the red teapot just like the one she described from her past.

"How?" She mumbled just before a tear fell from her cheek.
"I went exploring this morning, down to those little shops across town and just kept looking until I found all the things just like you described."

She gulps hard and I'm struggling to read her right now.

"Why?" Her scratchy voice manages to ask me.

"I just remembered you telling me about those special moments your dad created for you. When you needed it most. I don't know, I figured it would show you how much you mean to me." I scramble to explain myself but she doesn't look up from the counter. Tears continue to fall and I'm panicking that I've messed all this up already.

"Mia, please talk to me. Say something. Have I fucked up? I'm sorry...this was supposed to make you happy..."

Please baby, just talk to me.