The Suburbs

Chapter twenty

I could count on one hand the amount of times I have ever gone out for drinks on my own. It's not something I like to do, I don't mind my own company but I feel awkward sitting at a bar, alone.
Despite this, I'm still applying the last of my make-up and waiting for my taxi into town.
There's a new Cuban bar and to celebrate the grand opening, they're doing half price cocktails all night.

Today has more or less been a write off. I woke up with puffy eyes, a horrible feeling of emptiness in my stomach and overall, feeling hugely anxious.

I have tried to do all the things I could think of to make myself feel better, including a long soak in the tub, watching some more of my favourite movies and listening to my most upbeat playlist. But nothing has changed how unsure and fed up I feel.

That's when it hit me. I moved to a new area and the only people I have socialised with are my neighbours. No wonder I've allowed myself to crush over Jacob and get so caught up in their failed marriage. I haven't pushed myself to meet other locals and I really ought too. Tonight, I'm going to try and meet new people and maybe I'll start to see things in a whole different light. Jacob can go to the Bahamas for all I care. If he thinks I'm just going to be a bit of fun for a while and then when he is done and wants to work on his marriage he can just drop me and whisk his wife away to some glamorous hotel then he has another thing coming.

Thankfully getting dressed up and putting on a fresh face of make-up has made me feel better.
I'm wearing a black satin shirt dress and a belt, I bought it in a sale last year but never had the chance to wear it, until now.

The taxi beeps loudly outside my driveway and I grab my clutch bag, lipgloss and head out of the to door and towards the car. It's still quite light outside, despite it being nearly eight thirty.
Just as I open the car door, I hear a similar sound behind me. It's Jacob's car. His black Range Rover that he typically favours over his other two cars.

He spots me almost instantly as he appears from around the corner. His eyes go wide as he looks me up and down and admires my satin dress clinging against my curves but his expressions quickly changes to confusion and almost panic as I disappear into the taxi closing my door promptly behind me.

The taxi journey is only ten minutes away but the closer we get, the more nerves seem to take ahold of me. I can't help but worry that I might just look like a complete loser in a bar drinking alone. But I guess it's too late to turn back now.

"Where are you going looking like that?" The message flashes up on my phone screen.

It's Jacob. He must have found me on social media. I open the private inbox and read over his words again and again. I start typing but before I can even think of a decent reply, I delete it and put my phone back in my bag.

I don't have to justify myself to him. I don't have to answer his questions. The more I think about it, the angrier I become which makes me pull my phone out of my bag and message back.

"What has it got to do with you?" I click send and my heart begins to race as almost instantly I can see Jacob is typing back by the dots on the screen.

"What? Why are you being like that for?" He answers quickly.

I roll my eyes at his arrogance. As if I'm being like anything when he is the one booking romantic trips to the fucking Bahamas. Eurgh. I swear if I hear the word Bahamas one more time, or even think it, I'm going to scream. I am so fed up now and Jacob messaging me has just made it a hundred times worse.

"Mia? Are you going on a fucking date?" My phone lights up with his words again as another message invades my screen. This time I throw it back in my bag and tell myself that it's time I go and enjoy my night and not answer anymore of his annoying messages.