The Academy of S.I.D.E.

No. 36: Your Resident Cryptids

About a week after Heartwave became canon, Virgil was headed to class when Janus and Remus jumped out of the bushes and started dragging him back towards their dorms.

"Guys, come on," Virgil groaned. "You specifically said you wouldn't kidnap me anymore."

"We never said that, therefore, we're not bound to it," Janus reminded him. "And this is for an important reason."

"You're gonna make me miss Mission Strategy! That's one of the most important classes here!"

"The Mission Strategy professor's old as hell and a jillion times as boring," Remus said. "We're going to do something way better."

Virgil flopped his head backwards. "Is this just going to be a regular thing? Should I just be used to this?"

"You absolutely should," Janus told him. "We're going to need your skills for several things, and you might not agree to those things willingly."

"'Sides, it'll make my brother mad," Remus added, grinning. "It's absolutely hilarious when he goes on those Shakespearian monologues on how evil me and Jan-Jan are."

This time, the security guard barely even blinked when they dragged Virgil into the main building, probably because there were no tentacles involved this time.

The guard took out his walkie-talkie. "Someone tell Jeff that he owes me twenty bucks. Just saw Masquerade and the Duke of Nightmares drag in Nyx again."

"Oh come ON!" Virgil shouted.

.........

"Okay, nobody's around," Remus said. "I think we can reveal our plan."

"Whatever the hell it is, do you even need me for it?" Virgil asked, crossing his arms. "I can think of a million other things I'd rather be doing than going along with your weird-ass schemes."

"Virgil, be reasonable," Janus coaxed. "You haven't even heard what we're going to do."

"So next time, tell me what you're going to do before dragging me somewhere and making me miss class," Virgil retorted.

Remus grinned. "Y'know Professor Worthington?"

Virgil blinked. "That old-as-balls Biology professor? What's he got to do with this?"

"Everything," Janus said.

"You need to explain."

"Gladly." He started rummaging through his bag. "So, Professor Worthington, as you might know, is astoundingly medieval in his thinking, especially towards the female students. We've been intending to teach him a lesson for ages, but we've only just gotten real reason to."

Virgil raised an eyebrow. "Meaning?"

"He claimed that women couldn't fully grasp science and used my sister's lab report as an example. And yes, it was simply atrocious, but nobody insults Persephone except me, and I do not take kindly to people being sexist to her."

"Sounds fair," Virgil said. "So, are we blowing up his car or something?"

Janus shook his head. "We get into a lot more trouble if it's destructive, so we're taking a 'confuse, don't abuse' approach with our pranks from now on."

"So we're filling his dorm room with My Little Pony figures!" Remus finished, beaming.

Virgil slowly started to grin. "Are you serious?"

Janus held up a big garbage bag filled with brightly colored plastic horses. "Dead serious."

"Count me in," Virgil decided. "Just let me call Roman and tell him what's up. Hang on." He took out his phone and went to his contacts.