Star Wars Imagines (character X reader)

Hello my old heart

This story is heavily inspired by the some Hello my old heart by The Oh Hellos defiantly worth a listen. It's a wonderful song with a story and journey to follow and felt right for this story line.

Nothing hurts anymore. 

You can't feel the nagging tug at your heart, or the flutter in the pit of your stomach. You've been hurt one too many times for that. All that was once good in your life has been stripped away. 

Spinning your red saber your stand across a room from Ren huffing out a frustrated breath. He never gives you any leeway when training and today wasn't an acceptation, even though today he hasn't hit you with his saber he's kicking you down many times. Taking a few steps forwards you swing at Ren relentlessly, your skill evident but he blocks almost every hit with ease. A few swings nearly hit him but he dodges by a millimetre. Taking his turn to attack you do your best to keep him from making you move back but a strong swing at your leg makes you move quickly. Rolling under his saber you pop up behind him and use the force to nearly throw him across the room but he steadies himself after a few meters. Through his mask you hear an amused chuckle fizzle. 

"You are growing in strength Y/n. But always remember..." he pauses before using the force to throw you against a wall behind you, knocking the wind out of your chest. "...you cannot hesitate. No matter who you are told to kill you will strike them down. If I were ordered to kill you by Snoke I would. You are nothing without that strength." Ren snarls as you struggle for breath against the wall. Releasing you from his grip you try your best to stay on your feet as to not look weak. Turning to the door Kylo talks to a trooper before turning back to you.

"Y/n, Snoke wants your presence." Ren barks, his voice static through his mask. 

"Yes master."

You feel your stomach drop as your master speaks. Standing tall make your way to the throne room, your breath still hitching at times as your back aches from the impact on the training room wall. Walking with confidence you pass troopers and workers of the ship, not paying them any attention trying to keep up your reputation. Much like Ren you're feared throughout the first order. Your temper is less unpredictable than Kylo's however you do not hesitate to show those who angered you who they're talking to. Finally reaching the throne room you March in, standing at attention before the supreme leader. 

"Y/n. I am made aware that your training has been successful." Snoke says coldly as you stand your face emotionless. "Ren has informed me of your growing strength and I have heard the reports of your outbursts against officers. Despite them being a reckless use of your abilities I cannot dismiss them as proof that you have become a ruthless soldier, an attribute we have finally beaten into you. You are to leave with the next ship to join his search of Skywalker." 

Deep down you feel something shift, a discomfort most unnerving.

"Is this hesitance I sense in you?" Snoke sneers making you stand even taller.

"No Supreme Leader. I did not expect to be sent on a mission of such magnitude at this stage of my training. I will not let you down, Skywalker will die and the last of the Jedi with him." You say with a cold expression on your face. 

"For your own sake child you better not." Snokes words send a chill through your body, making your blood run stone cold. 

Bowing respectfully you walk out of the throne room and make your way down to the docking bays. Once you reach the command shuttle you sit ready, eager to start this mission. When Ren finally arrives he briefs you quickly before ordering for the ship to take off.