how to have sex with a rock star || lh

27.

q: who are your girl crushes? or crush if youre dedicated enough 

~~~~~~~~

It's been nearly a month and Luke's promises weren't exactly fulfilled as much as I had hoped for. Instead of talking on the phone daily, it was more like every other day, at most.

I understood though. I had to understand, I guess, but it didn't make me miss him any less. I felt like I didn't have anything useful to do in the next five months and that made my life feel worthless and lonely. But, you know, that was an average thought that came to mind. Curse my brain.

Since it had been a month, that meant that there were only two weeks before my graduation. It seemed like a joke whenever my parents brought it up.  My stomach felt queasy thinking about it and it didn't help that I was on my period.

"Ugh, are you okay? You sound like you're dying." Evan scoffed, plopping down on the couch next to me. It was a Friday and we were both extremely glad. I was even trying not to sulk in my room all weekend and actually hang out with my brother. 

"No, I'm not okay. You would be making the same deathly sounds I am if you had a uterus that shed every month." I slouched and held my palm out for Evan to hand me the remote. I couldn't bear to watch one more minute of TMZ.

"Ew, spare me the details. If you turn on Pretty Little Liars or The Vampire Diaries I won't hesitate to leave." he warned.

"Oh? excuse me? You want details?" I questioned, turning to him. "Right now my v-"

"Stop!" he yelled, laughing. I flicked him and turned back to the TV. I looked through all of our recordings, unimpressed with the overload of car shows that my dad watched way too much.

"At least I'm not pregnant." I added and he just made a sound of disgust. "Why didn't you want to invite anyone over?" I asked Evan as I turned on Netflix. He just shrugged and I poked him. "Seriously, our parents are out. You usually always invite your friends over when our parents go out to dinner."

"I don't know.. You've just been kinda down in the dumps lately cause of Luke." he shrugged again and I let out a loud 'awe'.

"You're the best brother!" I whined. He rolled his eyes but couldn't help but let a smile peek through.

"This doesn't mean you get to make me suffer through four girls trying to find out who A is, though." he warned me once again and I raised my hands in defense. 

~~~

"Pizza!" I yelled, closing the door with my foot. Evan jumped up as I set down the two boxes on our table in the living room. "You know what? I've never eaten a whole box of pizza before but I'm really tempted to right now." I admitted.

"Don't fight the urge." he laughed, taking a piece out of his box. My mouth was nearly watering at the melty cheese.

"Trust me, I'm not planning on it. I'll be right back." I said, starting to walk towards the kitchen to get extra napkins. "If you don't get that soda out of the couch, Mom is gonna murder you." I wagged a finger at him and he put a pillow over the stain. I rolled my eyes and ran out to the kitchen.

Once I got back, my phone rang next to Evan. He picked it up without even looking at the Caller ID.

"Hello?" he said in a super deep voice. I ran over to him and punched his arm. I immediately heard Luke's voice on the other line.

"I'll kill you!" I whisper-threatened and pulled my phone out of his grasp. "I'll be back in a little, okay?" I said before running to the staircase to talk to Luke.

"You still there?" I asked and he chuckled. "Sorry, my brother is an idiot." I sighed.

"Is it pathetic that I was kinda convinced that you were with a guy?" he laughed on the other end.

"What would you do if I was?" I asked, leaning against the wall of the stairs.

"Probably be really jealous, to be honest."

"Ohh. So you're one of those boyfriends?"

"Unfortunately." he dramatically sighed. "Anyways, how are you? What are you up to?"

"I'm hanging out with my brother. It's been a while but.. he's been really nice recently." I smiled. I heard a noise from around the corner and groaned. "Also he's been eavesdropping!" I yelled to make sure he could hear. I heard snickering and laughed to myself.

"Well, I don't want to keep you.."

"No, no, Luke, it's fine. I've seen Evan every day of my life practically. Minus a couple years. You didn't have a show tonight, right? What were you up to?"

"Writing all day. You've been helping a lot." he said and I could hear him smiling through the phone.

((kiss me thru the phone))

"I'm glad that I can be so helpful meanwhile you're in... where are you now? Texas?" I tilted my head.

"Yep. Texas. Isn't it called like... the boot state? or the hat state? I don't know, everything's kind of mixed up in my head." he sighed and I couldn't help but laugh.

"Hmm.. I think you're thinking about Italy." I suppressed my laughter. "You sound like you need sleep."

"I do. Ugh, it's been a while since I've gotten a night's sleep."

"Please sleep.. I know it's not that simple but trust me, I'm okay, everything's okay." I whispered, not wanting my nosy brother to hear.

"That helps a lot.. It's nearly 1am here, so I'm gonna try to sleep, I guess." he hummed on the other side. "I wish I could just talk to you all night."

"I do too.. but you need to be healthy. You have a meet and greet tomorrow. Be healthy and happy for your fans, okay?" I said, remembering what I had read online. "Goodnight, I love you."

"Love you too, Kristen... Goodnight." he responded, and I hung up before we did that weird couple thing where they argue who will hang up first.

It hurt having to feel like I was pushing him away. I didn't want to push him away, but I knew he had to sleep. He probably hadn't for a few days, and as much as I wanted to talk to him all night, I cared more about his fans than my own feelings.

I looked at my phone one last time before sliding it into my hoodie's pocket and walking back to the living room.

"How about we resume this awfully awful, hilarious, shit horror movie?" I sat on the couch for what seemed like the hundredth time that night and smiled towards Evan. "Oh, god, I'm starving. You better not have eaten both pizzas, I mean I know that conversation wit Luke took a bit and the pizza was super tempting but I will murder you."  I laughed, my stomach growling. I opened my box of pizza and pulled out a slice to immediately bite.

I smiled at him and he smiled back before nodding and resuming the movie.

~~~~~~~~

KRISTEN ACTUALLY BEING RATIONAL AND NOT CRYING ALL DAY ?? WHAT FANFIC IS THIS

i've been super good with updating recently k in the last 3 days i have updated 5 fanfics (including this) i aM on a roll (that will probably stop tomorrow bc school)

anyways hope this wasnt terrible bc i quickly edited it and its a bit shorter than usual. i think we're gonna hit another milestone soon so expect a long author's note next chp lol 

thank u all so much for reading and voting and following and messaging me and everything. u guys are very very cool ((britney spears calm down))