Closer 2

96.

Brett laid completely still as the way too bright light spilled into the room and forced him awake. Everything had been okay as he lied there in his half asleep state and enjoyed the warmth of his boyfriend's safe arms, but as consciousness slowly crept up on him, he could no longer pretend everything was fine.

Everything was definitely not fine. He had to talk to Eddy, had to explain that he would work on whatever it was that made Eddy pull away, that he would do anything to fix whatever he had done wrong the last few days. He just needed to know what it was. Needed to know how he had fucked up.

For now, though, he just wanted to enjoy Eddy's arms around him, because he didn't think he'd get that too often anymore, if ever. At least if he didn't fix whatever he was doing wrong.

Brett nuzzled his face into Eddy's chest, taking a deep breath. Tears were forcing their way out now, but he tried to fight them. It would be bad if Eddy woke up and had to comfort him.

"Bretty?" Eddy whispered as if trying to figure out if he was sleeping or not. Oh how badly Brett wished he was sleeping right then so he could have this for a bit longer.

"Yeah," Brett answered quietly, trying to move away from the embrace. He was surprised when the strong arm around his waist tightened its grip and pulled him closer again.

"No, no, don't... Please don't get up yet," Eddy said quickly, pressing a kiss to the top of Brett's head. "Please, let me have this for a bit longer. I'm sorry I came home late again."

Brett relaxed into his arms again with a sigh. Eddy had nothing to apologize for. He hadn't done anything wrong, but Brett probably had. Or maybe Eddy just didn't love him the same anymore? Maybe that was it? Didn't seem likely, though. At least not with how Eddy held him like he'd vanish if he didn't.

"Don't worry about it, Eddy. I just wish I knew why you don't want to be here anymore, so I could fix it," Brett mumbled quietly, closing his eyes. "I'll do anything, Eddy. I just don't know what I'm doing wrong."

"Nonono, no, it's... No Brett," Eddy mumbled sadly, hugging Brett tightly. Tears began flowing over just like they had the night before. "I'm so sorry I've made you think you've done anything wrong. I promise it's just me, I'm an idiot."

Brett didn't know what to say to that, just tilted his head up to kiss his cheek carefully and tightening his grip on Eddy a bit.

"I've just been with Leonora, to... to learn about how the twins are and... and I guess experience more of... of the pregnancy..?" Eddy explained, realizing as he spoke that this would make Brett feel a million times worse. "Just... just because I... I don't know. It didn't feel real, but now it does and I... I'm so sorry."

"Shh, Eddy... Eddy, if... if you want to do that... if that makes you happy..." Brett began, feeling his stomach slowly grow an ache.

"It does make me happy, but I should be just as happy here with you and Elise, but... but it's something else because they're kind of part of me? And I know it's fucked up, I know I shouldn't... I'm so sorry, Brett, I feel so guilty about it and about going behind your back about it and everything..."

"Eddy," Brett interrupted him, pulling back slightly to look at him and caressing his cheek. "It's okay. You're allowed to be excited about the twins, because they are yours. They are part of you."

"It's not okay, because it's gonna make you feel bad and I don't want that," Eddy sniffled, shaking his head. "I'm so sorry, Brett, I can't ever do anything right."

"I only want to be allowed into your excitement, Eddy," Brett said softly, wiping his tears with his thumb. He knew he had to do better so Eddy would feel safe letting him in. "It's okay to be excited even if I'm stupid about everything, Eddy mine."

Eddy shook his head slightly with a sigh, letting Brett go and sitting up quickly. He hid his face in his hands, letting a sob rip through him.

"Eddy mine, please," Brett said, sitting up too. He reached his hand out to stroke his back. "You're allowed to be happy. I promise, the right thing to do is to let me in. Let me experience it with you, even if I'm not as excited as you."