Closer 2

80.

Brett felt awful. He felt like the biggest asshole on planet Earth, the most selfish prick, the worst man to ever live. Of course he should have known Eddy felt used and unimportant because of him.

The fact that Eddy had only just told him there in front of a therapist felt like someone had punched him in the stomach. It was clear that Eddy didn't trust him, and it was pretty self explanatory that it was because Brett only ever thought about himself.

"I'm so sorry," was all he managed to squeak out as Eddy held himself next to him, refusing to let him touch him. "I never meant for you to feel that way, I had no idea. I thought we had talked through this."

"Of course you didn't, I never told you," Eddy sniffed, wiping his tears with the tissues the therapist had provided. "It's not really your fault, I just... I'm just in the way, always pulling you down and being in the way."

"That's not true, you're like half my reason to live," Brett squeaked, wanting to take Eddy's hand but being pretty sure he would be swatted away. He kind of wished he could wake up at discover this was a nightmare.

"But I'm just ruining your life, right? I've always just been holding you back, always having you stay back with me when you tried to go out always sacrificing things for me even though I never do anything for you," Eddy sniffled, shaking his head. "I'm so sorry I didn't... That I didn't give you up before. I know we're in way too deep now, I know you love me, but you'd be so much better off if you didn't."

Brett stood up and shuffled over to Eddy, just hugging him. He felt Eddy tense up, but he didn't let go.
"You've given me so much, Eddy. You always have," he whispered, feeling Eddy shaking in his arms. "I'll be better at telling you how grateful I am for all you do."

"Do you two want a moment to yourself?" the therapist asked softly, but Eddy shook his head slightly at that, carefully wrapping his arms around Brett.

"No, no, I'm sorry, I just... I feel like I'm... Like I just make everything worse for Brett..." he mumbled, snuffling softly as he buried his face in Brett's shoulder. "And I don't know how to stop doing that."

"It's because you make everything a hundred times better, I promise you are," Brett mumbled, not letting the hug go. "I wish I could let you read my mind so you'd know."

"Maybe we can do an exercise that might help out with that?" the therapist suggested with a smile, opening a drawer and finding two pieces of paper and some markers. "To help you understand more what you're grateful for in your relationship?"

Brett pressed a kiss to Eddy's cheek, waiting for him to answer what he wanted first. He didn't want to pressure Eddy anymore.

"Okay," Eddy agreed, slowly letting Brett go. "We can do that."