Never Meant to Be

P. 19

Ghosmmy

Everyday that I'm a ghost, I start adapting to my cheerful self. It isn't getting as annoying anymore, considering I literally can't do anything about it. I kind of let the ghost do its own thing when I talk to Tubbo, hoping the translation won't come off as rude or anything.

"Hey Tommy," Wilbur's glum voice said.

"Hi," I said, turning around. I saw Ghostbur floating behind me, looking at Tubbo.

I looked with him, seeing that he was walking around L'manburg, fixing things here and there to make it look perfect.

"He's a great president, you know?" Ghostbur said, looking back at me.

"Yeah, I wish I could express how much him being president means to me in my own words though," I said.

Tubbo didn't seem to see us, he walked straight through us, continuing down the path. He's starting to head to my old base now. Well, Tommy's old base. 

I follow him through the entrance and watches as he pulls out something dark with color in the center. He walks outside to the bench that we always sat on and put the thing inside a jukebox. A nice melody started playing, causing me to sway with the music.

"This is some nice music," I said, talking to Wilbur.

"Oh, hi Ghosmmy!" Tubbo said. I looked at him, realizing I probably just appeared for him. I looked around for Ghostbur, but he was nowhere in sight, probably off to do something else.

"Hi Tubbo," I say.

"This is nice music, isn't it? You remember Mellohi, don't you?" he asked.

"Mellie? What's that?" I ask in a weirded out tone. Instead it comes out cheerfully, but I don't mind it.

"Mellohi, the disc," Tubbo says, his face filling with concern.

I furrow my eyebrows as I watch Tubbo's face go pale.

"Ghosmmy, you don't remember Mellohi?" he asked. He sounded really serious now, and it was starting to concern me.

"No, why? Should I?" I ask curiously. 

"Tommy, Mellohi is the thing that created L'manburg. And, you don't remember it?" Tubbo asked.

"I know some shit started L'manburg, I didn't think it was called Mellohi or something," I said. A simple "no" came out of my ghostly mouth instead.

"Oh," Tubbo replies. He looks back into the sky and I can see the feeling of his stomach dropping. He doesn't talk to me anymore so I go off on my own, trying to find Wilbur. 

I go down into the sewers where Wilbur lives, seeing him brewing some drugs. I watch him from behind, seeing him pour ingredient after ingredient into bottles of water. 

Ghostbur looks behind him, seeing me. "Are you okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, why? Do I not look okay?" I asked. I guess my words don't change itself when I'm talking to another ghost in private.

"Well, you seem to have a headache."

"How do you know?"

"You're rubbing your head, very vigorously might I add."

I look to my right, seeing nothing. I look to the left, seeing my hand up against my head.

"What the fu-" I start. I force my hand down from my head, but sharp ringing replaces it. The searing pain in my head almost brings me down to the ground, but I relax my hand again, and everything is back to normal. Except my hand was still massaging my head very weirdly.

"What am I doing.?" I mumbled.

"Let go," Ghostbur said to me.

"Pardon?"

"Let go," he repeated. "It's happened to me sometimes, it only lasts for a little bit. Much better than seeing your unconscious hand rubbing your head all the time."

I guess so, it was getting pretty uncomfortable in my head. 

My hand forces itself down, causing the pain to come back. It felt like a headache, but it burned every muscle of my body at the same time. I fell onto my knees, trying to keep my hand down. It would only last for a few more seconds, I told myself.

Visions came creeping into my eyesight. I saw myself towering up a pillar with Dream, Tubbo yelling in my ear. I remember giving Tubbo something that meant a lot to me, but I couldn't quite remember what. I hear the same tune from the bench again, but this time it felt distorted.

But then, everything was gone. The memories, the pain, everything.

"What was that..?" I asked Ghostbur. 

"I don't know, I experience it very infrequently. But don't worry, you'll get used to it," he said.

"I saw something though.. I can't make out what it was that I saw," I replied, trying to dig inside of my memory. No matter how hard I tried, nothing came up.

"Yeah, I know. It might be us losing our memory, that's my theory. I'm not completely sure though. All I know is that the visions feel familiar, and then they're gone. Just my thoughts on it," Ghostbur said.

"Why didn't you tell me about it?" I asked, kind of sassily.

"Well, you would experience it one day. I guess I could've given you a warning, but eh."

'Eh'? I repeated.

"Alright, whatever, I'm going back to the cave to get some rest. You do you," I told him, going back up the sewers.

What was that shitty vision? It gave me feeling similar to when I was listening to the music that Tubbo played, but I couldn't quite make out what it was. Was I supposed to remember? I don't know. Maybe Ghostbur's right, maybe I am forgetting.

But how would I even know what I forgot?