Love & Hate || Nishimura Riki ✓

thanks hyung

ni-ki woke up from his sleep at 3 in the morning .. he switched his position to check if the two older guys are still there . he first saw jay on his side sleeping soundly . he sat up to find where heeseung was and he saw him sleeping quietly on the floor at the side of his bed .

"oh my god .. did i just let millionaires to sleep in my not so soft bed and on the floor ? " ni-ki unbelievably whispered but then he just shrugged it off

he got up from his bed to head to the kitchen to get some water .. he felt his throat so dry .. after drinking some water , he get his jacket and went outside .

he found himself sitting on the wooden swing outside their house .. he looked up at the skies and some stars are now shining .. the rain had stopped hours ago and clouds are scattered , uncovering the stars .

he let out a sigh .

he remembers everything that had happened between shaira and him and it hurts him .. it hurts how he pushed shaira away from him .. it hurts that the girl he likes was the daughter of the man he despised the most .. it hurts that he can't accept everything about shaira even though he loves her .. maybe he doesn't love her fully .. maybe those feelings were untrue .. maybe he was just not in love or maybe , he just wasn't ready to accept shaira because of her dad .

this time , he cried again .. he cried in silent not wanting anyone to know . he was silently suffering when someone talked .

"ni-ki .." the owner of the voice sounded worried

"heeseung hyung " he said as he waited for the guy to come near him ..he sat in a wooden chair

"you know Ni-ki , you can share it with me .. if you just want of course.. I'm not pressuring you tho"

he stopped from crying " hyung .. am i right in pushing her away  ?" he asked the older " I don't know where you're coming from Ni-ki but if that what your hearts says then let it be .. I'm not in the position to tell you what to do but I'm here to listen and guide you"

" i don't know what to do now hyung .. my mind keeps telling me that I should stay away from her but my heart is longing for her "

"i haven't experienced something like this kid but i guess you should just wait for your heart to heal .. i think you should have to forgive in order to heal " heeseung advices

" but it's really hard to just forgive him hyung .. he killed my parents and i almost died .. he took everything that is for me .. i guess forgiving him was the most difficult thing that i would ever do in my life"

" you should at least try Ni-ki .. well i know that he must pay for everything that he done .. let justice do his thing and if not , just trust this to God because he knows who to punish .." he patted Ni-ki's head

" yeah hyung .. even though i knew he was behind all of this , i still don't have a heart to go after him because first i have no power and money .. he was a big person i can't just file something he will just use his money to bribe those law makers easily .. because justice sucks .. and secondly , I don't want shaira to suffer like i am so I'll let him and put the trust on the above .. i know someday karma will meet him face to face and i don't want to get my self dirty because of him"

" well , that's good to know Ni-ki .. i know justice sucks especially to those who are in the lowest level of the society but we're here , your hyungs to help you .. we could fight for your parents' justice .. if you want to " heeseung said and Ni-ki looked at him

" nahhh hyung .. i know y'all want to help but my trust in justice was buried on the ground a long time ago . I'll just let him since i promised shaira i wouldn't do anything to her dad .. and of course i won't use your money . it'll be a waste if things won't go like we want " Ni-ki protested .. he just doesn't want himself to be bothered by Min Jooyun ..

" if you say so Ni-ki .. I'm just saying we're all here for you .. whatever you need we will gladly give it to you because you're our little brother . we want to help you and we don't want you to get hurt" the younger was touched by the older's statement

" aww hyung thank you .. really .. woah i got chills " he said jokingly but was sincere to thank his hyung .. heeseung just giggled

" haha .. Ni-ki i know you're not used to people caring for you because you grew without parents but we're now here for you .. you have an addition to your family .. it's us .. so feel free to tell all your burden to us .. tell us what makes you happy .. tell us if you're sad .. you could tell us even if you discovered something .. we want you to feel that you have us Ni-ki because you are not alone " he felt like crying again .. his hyung's words really touches his heart .. he can't find anyone like his hyungs and he is so thankful that he met them

" thanks hyung .. i really mean it ." he simply said " anything for you kid .. you know we had grew a bond in you and we felt like you're a family to us .. especially to jay , he's been so open in saying that he really love you and we do also even if we can't always express it , we dearly adore you Ni-ki so don't ever feel that you are alone because you are not . if something bothers you , tell us .. "

" hmmm , okay hyung .. I'm so grateful for meeting you all " heeseung hugged him tightly which Ni-ki gladly accepted

" but shaira .. " he froze from moving  " i still can't face her .. "heeseung released from the hug

" if you're not yet ready now Ni-ki then don't .. heal your heart first and learn to forgive .. shaira doesn't do anything to you so it's unfair if you'll ignore her and just throw away everything . you said you love her .. then don't make her suffer because of her dad..  she doesn't deserve to be treated like this after all .. take the time you needed but not that long because it might be too late and you'll regret " his last words keep Ni-ki thinking .. what does he mean by regret

" what do you mean hyung ?" he asked confused

"umm .. don't mind it .. just get back to her if you're ready " he doesn't want to expose jake .. jake is his dear friend also and he doesn't want his friends fight for a girl because based on jake's movements recently he knows he's up for something .. he just waiting for a right time .. but what if the time he wanted was now ? now that these two were not in good terms .. what if he'll take advance step and jump into his own game ? hee had these in his thoughts but he just keep it silent .. he doesn't want to get involve

" okay hyung .. i felt guilty for breaking up with her actually "

" it's okay ni-ki i know shaira would understand " Ni-ki just nodded in response " let's go back now ?

"alright .. it's actually cold here outside hyung .. thank you for your wise words hehe " heeseung smiled

" i hope you find peace in your heart Ni-ki .. and fix your broken bond with shaira because she deserves to be loved "

"aye aye captain! " ni-ki salutes and hee just ruffled his hair

"aigoo .. let's head inside .. I'm still sleepy" both of them went inside to sleep again ..