Fire In The Mountains ( NESSIAN FANFIC)

Chapter 20

I just wanna say I am sorry, And I really apologize for the late release of the chapter. I am beyond grateful for you guys. It's just I don't wanna pressure myself into this yet. And with my exams going on, things are just a bit too messy. Please don't give up on the book. There's literally loads of great things coming up. And I can't wait to share it. Enjoy this chapter till then. X

"Gentleman" I started and everyone silenced. 

"It so happens that I know who you are going after for the crime I committed. And it doesn't seem so fair to me. I am also aware that I have disappointed many people here by fleeing off from the ritual yesterday. And I accept the consequences. Lord Cassian only climbed the mountain because he had no choice, being part of the ritual he had to complete, he had to find me. And he did but not until, we had half climbed it. And there's no going back once a person starts climbing, as you all know. Punishing him, punishing the whole night court by getting him off the post is meaningless, and cruel and full of queer envy. Because even after knowing the truth if you do this, then your intentions would be clear. And I know that you all are aware of what I am talking about." 

Rhysand looked expectantly at the crowd ahead, his hands behind his back. And Cassian had an uncanny expression on his face. Feyre nudged my elbow a bit, and I looked at her powerful figure. Indeed, my sister. The crowd was whisper talking it was hard to understand the words being spoken. Lord Owen came by to stand at my side. "You do realize what you have exactly portrayed here right? You just admitted that you are the one who should be punished." He whispered so very silently that it looked like he actually cared about it. "I am well aware of that Lord Owen.  And I have no intention of taking my words back. I don't care about it as long as my sisters are happy. I have done enough wrong in my life, one punishment doesn't even suffice it." I didn't hear him say anything else. So i stood there, pondering over what i said. I felt his eyes on me, and when i lifted my head, I saw Cassian brimming with rage. What did I do this time? For all I know he should be thankful when they choose me instead of him. He looks at me, pointing over to the woods. The camp was now properly made again, The tents were back at place, and the alpine trees were huge and enchanting. I thought of not having a talk with him, it gave me a feeling that it would end bad. But nevertheless I went in. When I  heard his feet shuffling, I sighed and exclaimed. "You can thank me later." 

I heard him scoff. I whirled around. "What was that for?" He covered up the distance between us and grabbed my elbow, pushing me face front on the tree, my back to his chest, and my elbow twisted between us. I pushed back but he didn't even waver. "Why did you do that? Nesta Archeron you had no freaking right to take the blame. You are going to walk out and tell them it was nothing. Tell them whatever you please but make them believe that it wasn't you." I pushed him off, "I made a decision you prick, and I am going to stick by it. I don't care, I don't care about what you say." Cassian groaned in displeasure. And that groan was so animalistic kind that I flinched. He shook his head, and when he looked up his eyes softened but were full of mischief. "Nesta we can't owe each other for these big sacrifices, I mean normally people thank each other for flowers, chocolates, hell even the high lord and high lady are normal for thanking for been given a estate. But we thank each other for saving our lives. Can this shit be anymore real?" 

I almost smiled to see him joke like that and so I continued with the charade. "Well you owe me now. And now its up to you to get me out of this grave that I dug for myself." He grinned. "You bet!" We stroll out of the woods, "What were you talking to Lord Owen about." He asked, kicking on the stones, "Nothing important." He nodded and waved his hand through his hair. "Do you think the warriors would agree. Be honest about it." I asked when none of us said anything for awhile. He assessed my question, thinking ever so dramatically. "Well, your speech wasn't that good, though that gentlemen thing rocked. Plus it was you speaking, half the illyrians were shitting themselves. Some were hooked on you, some on your body, some were trying to fake listening to you. Yeah so well let's just say It went pretty good for the first time." I made an horrified expression "Okay don't be that honest." He laughed and I gave a faint hint of a smile. Sometimes when I look back a few months, I can't comprehend the person I was, Maybe i still am. But it's not hard to smile now. It's actually refreshing. I feel cherished. I feel okay. And I guess that's enough. I don't think I yet believe myself to be better, but I might be on the way. Sometimes people make bad decisions, sometimes people end up on the wrong path, sometimes it's too late to be good, and sometimes no one cares. I guess I was one of those people once. But everyone has a story. Everything has a reason. I believe my soul wasn't tarnished, just dusted with freckles of wild stories of hatred, longing, love. Though I believed in love. I believed in my mother. I believed in myself once. But then I was a different person. A stranger. A stranger that made me give up. 

After Tomas, I wasn't even confident anymore. I never told anyone, never wanted to let anyone know that I was weak. There was a moment, a stupid , dumb moment in my life when I felt like I was in love. But Tomas shared a different idea of it perhaps. I never said it aloud, or maybe I did, but Rhys and Feyre's love and devotion towards each other is something out of the whole Prythian. If I wasn't this awful, hulky person then I might have been crazy happy for them. But their love just disturbs me. Its just that pure. It looks blissful. But I want it wild. And raw. And calming but fierce. Like when you ignite a fire. As if jumping from a cliff, diving deep into the water, holding on to your breath, losing your senses, the feeling of death but then coming back up and realizing you are alive. Unexpected. A place between living a little and dying a little. I guess that would make life or these immortal years bearable.

I didn't realize what I was doing when I noticed, we had stopped. And Cassian was holding my hands. No wait, I was holding his. And he was looking at that and then me. 

Uhhh Cauldron boil me!!

The next part in continuation.... Hold in your reigns people, here we go.