Say You'll Share With Me | Phantom Oneshots

Like Me

Erik's eyes were wide open and locked on the ceiling, even though the bedroom was dark and Christine slept soundly beside him. He couldn't fall into a peaceful slumber as she had, not with the news she had given him earlier that day that he was still trying to comprehend.

Pregnant! But how could that be? Well, he knew how and he could practically see the smirk on Nadir's face already; they had had an incredible awkward discussion about protection, after all. That conversation had gone out the window, though; Erik couldn't exactly recall a night of intimacy where he completely forgot that factor, but that had clearly been the case at least once or he wouldn't be in the state of panic that he was.

Panicked was a remarkable understatement - petrified was probably a better description of what he was feeling. Turning his head to look over at his wife, the knot in his stomach only tightened when he noticed the slight swell of her abdomen, plain evidence of the life growing inside of her - the life that they had created. Something so small and helpless, yet it instilled so much fear in his heart.

He didn't know the first thing about being a parent! He had never known his father, Giovanni had tried and failed in Italy, and Nadir was more of a brother than anything. On top of that, his mother was far from a good example, so he had no true reference point to pull from, and that inexperience terrified him. Not knowing was not something Erik was comfortable with, that much was for certain.

With a heavy sigh, Erik slowly sat up and got out of bed, pressing a light kiss to Christine's forehead before stepping out of the room to slip on his cloak and go to see the only person he knew he could talk to about everything on his mind.

~~~~~

"So Christine is pregnant. That is...quite the development," Nadir said softly as he set a cup of tea in front of Erik. Admittedly, his friend had been rather peeved when he had arrived in the middle of the night to awaken him, but once the circumstances had been disclosed, he had relaxed quite quickly.

"I don't know what I'm meant to do," Erik replied, twisting his wedding band around his finger.

"To be frank, not leaving your pregnant wife at home alone without telling her where you are going is a good start."

Erik looked down at his feet, ashamed of his own actions. "I didn't know how long I could keep my feelings to myself. She had been gushing about the baby all day since she told me; about its nursery and names and all its little clothes. But I said nothing because I'm so terrified that the child...that they will..."

"That they will look like you," Nadir finished, his voice quiet as he sat down next to his friend.

A simple nod was Erik's initial response. "I couldn't bear it. You know I have never been inclined to have children because I didn't want them to carry the burden of the life I've led. I couldn't curse them with a face like mine that will only mean suffering for them."

"Their life would be nothing like yours, Erik. They would have a mother that loves them, and a father that would do anything for them," Nadir said, setting his hand on his friend's knee. "They would be so well protected from any sort of adversity that might come their way."

"But I don't know what I'm doing," Erik said, clenching his fists in frustration as he tried to get his companion to see the viewpoint. "I have never been around a child, have never felt any connection with one. I don't know how to be around them, how to be so...so gentle and tender."

"Well, that is a remarkable lie," Nadir said matter-of-factly, giving Erik a small smile when he turned to him. "I've seen you with a little boy - with my little boy. You were the kindest and the gentlest I have ever seen you when you were with him. You do know how to be around a child that you care for, believe me."