Never Stop (Shoni)

Chapter Six

***
"Stage 3 Non-Small Cell Lung Cancer."
Those were the words that would haunt Shelby for the rest of her life.

All the coughing, fatigue, shortness of breath, all things that led her to believe she was suffering from a bad cold turned out to be something way worse.

When the cold didn't subside her primary care physician decided to order some blood tests. When the results came back, she was immediately sent over to the Hospital to get some further testing done.

"I have cancer?" Shelby asked Dr. Keaton.

"I know this is really hard to process but remember this was to be expected. Your scare when you were 13 led us to believe that lung cancer could possibly be in your future."

"I just-I don't-"

"What does this mean Doctor, what are our next steps?" Shelby's dad said cutting her off.

She didn't mind being cut off. Her mind was racing a mile a minute, way too fast to formulate a coherent sentence.

Her mother rubbing her back was the only thing keeping her grounded enough to not have a full break down.

"Well, since the malignant tumor is sitting on your lower left lobe and has metastasized to your lymph nodes and mediastinum, surgery is not an option at this time." Dr. Keaton said while looking at his notes.

"Okay so surgery is out of the question, how do you get to the point where the operation is safe?" Shelby's mother asked.

"We recommend 3-4 months of neoadjuvant chemotherapy. What this does is shrink the tumor to a size that is safe to be removed."

***

"Wow."

"I know."

"Shelby why didn't you tell me this? You have cancer and didn't think to share that with me?"

After Tonis confrontation at the party, Shelby dragged her upstairs to talk about what she had just heard.

She did however have to repeat herself way too many times to count since Toni is beyond Crossed.

"I was scared Toni, imagine finding out you're dying, it's scary."

"You're not dying Shelby, from what you told me there's already a plan set in place."

Shelby gets up and starts pacing around Leahs bedroom.

"It's Stage 3 Toni, not stage one, not stage two but stage three. That's not good. Odds aren't really in my favor for this." Shelby sat down next to Toni with a big sigh.

"Is that why you broke up with me?" Toni asked playing with her fingers.

"What?"

"Did you break up with me because you think you're going to die?" Toni asked again this time making eye contact with the blonde.

"I didn't want to hurt you. This thing in my chest is a ticking time bomb and I don't want to hurt more people than I already have to." Toni wiped away a few tears that were falling down the blondes cheeks.

"God you're such an idiot." Toni said getting up, taking over the pacing role.

"How?"

"Shelby, we're human. All of us are dying. You, me, Leah, Racheal, Nora, Dot, Fatin, Martha, all of us are dying. Death is inevitable, you can't stop living your life because you're scared."