He lied, was the only thought that echoed - over and over - inside of me.
"Why Vihaan?" I asked more desperately. "If you knew the consequences, why did you have to lie?!"
Instead of looking at me, he jumped down from the car trunk, raking a hand through his hair.
"Go home."
"I'm not not going anywhere until you tell me!"
His jaw clenched, as he turned to speak to Rishi. "Would you mind grabbing my gym bag from the sports lockers? You know the lock combination right?"
"Uh, y-yeah sure." "I'll go with him as well." Jay hinted, motioning at Vicky, who he shook his head in refusal. The departure of the two left the atmosphere lonely and hostile.
"So what else? You're ready to submit the project tomorrow Vicks?"
"Vihaan..." Vicky cautioned, with a raised eyebrow.
I've officially had enough. "Can you stop going around the curves, Vihaan, and just answer me?!"
"Don't forget, I'm joining you guys at the regular time tomorrow morning. Don't leave without me--"
"WILL YOU STOP AVOIDING--"
In a thump of a heartbeat, he was up in my face, glaring down my eyes. "What do you WANT?!"
I didn't notice Vicky attempting to pull him back, or the sun hiding behind the cloud, or even the nearly empty student parking lot. I should have been calm, but this new person in front of me, left me agitated. "I need you to give me answers! Why did YOU take the blame? Who even--"
He let out a sarcastic laugh, one filled with pure spite and derision. "To the person who broke down just from the attention about getting in a car with me, I'm surprised! Would you even have been able to handle the rumors on someone assaulting you?!"
Silence. Not because I had anything to say back, rather because it took too long to process his attack of words.
"Vihaan stop it! You have no right to release your anger on whoever you want!" Vicky grabbed his wrist to yank him back, but he stayed put.
"Varun beat him up on the soccer ground late yesterday morning. He probably would have broken bones if I didn't stop him! Varun made it even -- that idiot won't even think of raising his head again! But if the truth had been let out today, all of our parents would get involved, Arun would spew up some rumors in anger, and YOU...you would start crying waiting for me to wipe away your tears! What I did today, nobody could have done. I saved Varun's butt and settled you back in your cocoon. I saved you all from losing something! Don't go shouting at me!"
This time Vicky succeeded in jerking him back by the shoulder. "Have you gone mad?! Whatever you did today was YOUR fault! Don't go blaming her! Looks like you didn't recover from your loss yet. Just shut your mouth and get in the car!"
"Vicky...can you wait a minute." I finally uttered out. "You said everything you needed to, right Vihaan? Now listen to what I need to say."
No matter how much I felt like trembling, I stayed put. Because once he crossed the line, I had no restrictions to hold back. "Who even told you to keep helping me? Because I surely didn't! First Ria...."
I definitely made sure to capture the flash of hesitance in his eye. "You thought I wouldn't find out?! You bargained with her to be a friend, making me seem like some pathetic loser who can't even make her own friends! Dropping me home, handling the rumors, tagging along in the bus, even giving me this confidence right now! Why did you do all this?! If you're so furious with the punishment you got, why did you even BOTHER?! Why did you even approach this simple, introverted, middle-class girl in the first place?!
He stood there stunned, making me doubt he could even digest the words I spat out.
My tone grew more distressed. "I t-thought we actually shared a bond - a friendship, SOMETHING - over the past 5 months. I should have realized it earlier. Vihaan, you're a closed book, and every time I try to understand you, you leave me more confused and frustrated than before. It's like you're holding all these secrets and hidden motives, sometimes, I just get too tired trying. I finally realize it now -- you've just turned into a big distraction."
Vicky had streaks of tears...emotional lad. Perhaps, that would've been me too, if I had taken a moment to understand what I was even saying. Why I was even letting this all out now.
"We're like crossroads Vihaan Khatri. Each of our tracks has its own personality and aspirations. We only come together once, before we're back on our way - apart from each other....I think it's time I head on my own way."
Before, I could actually break down like he said, I turned my back onto him. Wandering farther and farther away...from the core of my anguish.
Vihaan
The way home was a silent one. While Vicky offered to take the wheel, I sat in the passenger seat watching the window blur images before my sight. Just like how everything from before blurred out.
"Vicky, are you disgusted by me?"
"If I were to be honest, yes. But since I'm a friend who made the other realize their mistake, maybe not such a strong word."
"...she actually did something to me. All these months. I don't-I don't know how to describe it. It felt--" my breath sped up rapidly, cutting off the words.
"Vih, calm down. I know you regret it, but she doesn't know that. I don't think she wants to know either."
He quickly spoke up again, at the look of horror on my face. "No no what I meant was...give her time. What you did today was pretty harsh. It's going to take a while for her to forgive you, but that doesn't mean you don't try."
"And if she still doesn't?" I dreaded.
"Move on...like last time."
~~
My body jolted up in shock and cold sweat in the middle of the night.
"I thought we actually shared a bond..."
We did Jiya...but I shattered it.
~~
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