Back to you - Hotchniss

happier with you

"Emily, I'm so sorry", Reid apologized as soon as he had found her outside. "It just slipped!"

"It's okay", Emily replied and threw out the remaining filter of her cigarette.

"Really?"

"I know you didn't mean it", she gave him a reassuring smile. "And this night was doomed from the very beginning on, wasn't it?"

"Kind of", he agreed.

"See?", she shrugged. "But if you ever going to do something like this again, I am going to kick your ass."

"Understood", Reid nodded and suddenly Morgan's head popped over his shoulder: "Yo, everything alright?"

The other two nodded, so he motioned them to follow him: "Let's get to the dance floor!"

Of course he knew about the previous incident, and he really wanted Emily to feel better, so he had figured that dancing and drinking would be the only convenient way in that moment. And it definitely was; Emily had no idea for how long she had carelessly danced with the other team members, until that one point, where she discovered Aaron sitting alone at the bar.

"I'll go to the restroom", she told the others in a loud voice, doubting that they were even understanding her with that loud music on.

Quickly, she made her way over to the bar and slowed down a few feet behind him. She had no idea what she was doing, but she knew that she didn't want him to be alone - especially after what had happened a while ago.

"Is this seat taken?", she almost asked shyly.

Hotch turned his head to look at her, and he slightly shook his head 'no'. Taking that as an invitation, Emily let herself fall on the chair next to him and waved the bartender to bring them two more beers.

"I'm sorry for what happened earlier", she then sighed.

"You don't have to be", he replied. "You didn't say a word about us. And I probably should've told her beforehand."

"Where did she go?", Emily asked and took a sip of her beer.

Hotch eyed her up, trying to figure out how drunk exactly she was. In the years of their relationship, he had somehow managed to create an imaginary scale for her alcohol consumption in his head, estmating how sane she still was. That night, however, he had difficulties finding out.

"Home, I guess", he then replied and also took a sip. "We fought."

"I figured", she gave him a sad smile. "But she'll come around again, I'm sure."

Hotch hesitated. He really wanted to say it, but he just couldn't. It would cause a lot more problems between them, for sure.

"Oh my god", Emily then gasped, and he knew immediately that she had probably seen it in the way he had furrowed his eyebrows at her previous statement. "You don't want her to come back."

"I never said that", he quickly said through gritted teeth.

"You didn't have to", Emily replied.

Sober her would have never talked to him like that, that open and light hearted - but there she was, drunk beyond measures and not afraid of showing it. Slowly, he began to realize, too, that his ex-fiancée was terribly boozed.

"Sorry", she then sighed. "I hate seeing you like this."

"Like what?"

"Unhappy", she said. "You're unhappy. But I'm sure it's all going to get better again, at least that's what I keep telling myself."

"What if I gambled the only thing that made me happy away?", Hotch then asked, his eyes directly looking into hers.

Emily swallowed thickly, and it was her turn to fall silent for a few seconds. Then she retorted: "There is always more than one thing that can make a person happy."

"How would you know?"

"I don't", she stated truthfully. "But I really hope that there is, otherwise we're all doomed, aren't we?"

Hotch smiled slightly and lowered his gaze to the beer in his hands. It was weird to talk to her like that; so easily and without any tension, like there had been in the cabin a few days ago. They weren't constantly turning mad at the other, yet, they were completely honest. It was a familiar feeling, and he realized how much he had actually missed her all the time.

"Probably", he then nodded and emptied his beer.

"I'll drink to that", Emily smiled and also took the last sip of her drink, tottering lightly on her chair as she put the glass back on the counter with much more force than she had intended to.

"I think that was your last drink for tonight", Hotch raised his eyebrows as she watched her regaining her balance.

"Looking out for me, Hotchner?", she grinned but rolled her eyes.

"Just making sure that not everyone of my agents come in completely hung-over tomorrow", he sighed.

"Fair enough", Emily nodded and pushed the empty glass away from her. "I think I should get going anyways. It's been a long night."

"You're not going to drive by yourself, are you?"

"Do I look that stupid?", she gasped. "Of course not, I already came here by cab."

"I can drive you home", he offered, surprising himself. Why was he being so soft towards her again?

"I don't think that this is a good idea", Emily sighed and pulled her jacket over her shoulders.

"Why?"

"Because I am drunk", she stated. "And you are my ex-fiancé. This is predestined to go wrong."

Once again, her drunkenness was showing - the Emily Prentiss the world saw every day would have never in a million years admitted that she was distrusting herself and her self-control sometimes.

"I am not drunk", he shrugged. "I think I am able to resist you in the worst case."

A chuckle escape both their lips, and Emily just shrugged, too: "Fine. I'll just quickly say goodbye to the others."

Hotch watched her in awe as she made her way to the dance floor. In the past years, he had often found it annoying when she had been drunk, because it had often turned her into a childish and horny teenager version of herself, but in that moment, he enjoyed being able to openly talk to her for one night. All this would surely be forgotten the next day.

"Ready?", he asked as she returned.

"Whenever you are", she smiled and they both walked towards the exit.

Sometimes two people just need to fall apart to grow back together again, stronger and better for each other - at least that's what many people say. But lightning old flames always brought dangers with it, and who could assure them that they wouldn't burn the other down completely if they did so?