Back to you - Hotchniss

broken glass

Time had always been a complex issue to Aaron. When it came to their work, they always seemed to run out of time; there was never enough of it. After he had gotten together with Emily for the very first time, he had felt like there would never be enough time with her, though they had promised each other a forever back then. Even forever wouldn't be enough with her, he had always thought.

When she had then forced him to give up the illusion of staying together forever, time had started to pass terribly slowly and he had felt like every day the hours had only gotten longer and longer, the emptiness within him swallowing every happy memory he had had of them together. Looking back, it seemed like it had been decades since they had been so unbelievably happy, even though it had only been two years ago.

And now, that he knew that Emily was going to leave again soon, time seemed to rush past him even quicker, probably because she herself didn't attempt to stay in Quantico longer than necessary.

She hadn't lied when she had told him that she'd accept Interpol's offer as soon as possible, and when Hotch had arrived in his office the next day, her transfer papers had already been waiting for him on his desk.

The rest of the team had been rather shocked when Emily announced the news, and all of them were well aware of the fact that it had something to do with Hotch, especially since Rossi and Morgan had witnessed how the two had yelled at each other the night before.

"Is there anything that could change your mind?", Garcia had nearly sobbed, her eyes already watery. Never in a million years she had believed that they would have to say good-bye to Emily again.

"No", Emily had given her a sad smile, trying to hold it together. "It's already settled."

Clyde had booked the soonest flight, and Emily couldn't say that she was exactly thrilled to find herself at a crowed airport the next day. The boxes from her apartment would only be shipped in the next few days, but for the first week, she would be fine with her travel bag. This was what she was used to due to her work at the BAU.

"The check-in for flight A380 to London Heathrow is now opened."

Emily almost flinched at the sound of the announcement which echoed above her head. Lifting her bag over he shoulder, she quickly made her way over to the check-in without a second thought.

Hotch didn't exactly know how he had ended up driving to the airport. The more he had thought about the situation, the more his mind had started spinning and the next thing he had registered was that he was in his car, on the way to the airport. He had no clue whether he was too late already or what he was going to say or do if he wasn't - but he felt like he needed to get there.

The destination board had never seemed this full to him, all the letters and numbers blinking in this striking yellow made him feel like he would go blind if he stared at it any longer. After he discovered the gate to the next flight to London Heathrow, he shamelessly used his FBI badge in order to get past security even quicker. Strauss would dispraise him for that, but he couldn't care less.

He was running out of time, and the more he realized that the quicker he ran, until he finally stopped at gate C. People were already boarding, and he felt his heart pounding in his chest as he scanned the crowd for the raven-haired woman. When he finally discovered her, she was about to give her ticket to the woman behind the counter.

Hotch wanted to shout her name, to tell her to wait and hear him out, but any word got stuck in his throat. He wanted to run over to her, but it seemed like his whole body was paralyzed as he suddenly came back to his senses.

Maybe this was right; maybe this was how it was supposed to be.

Maybe Emily had been right; maybe they both needed to get away from each other in order to finally find happiness again.

He swallowed thickly as he watched how she walked past the counter, ready to walk through the tunnel into the plane.

She wouldn't be there if she wanted it any other way, Hotch thought. She knew what she was doing, and she probably knew what was best for her. He had no right to intervene her way of gluing herself back together again.

Suddenly, Emily turned around once more and their eyes met.

Usually people would expect this to be the moment; the moment where everything would change and they'd fall into each other's arms again in the next second.

But it wasn't the moment.

She gave him a sad smile, whereas he gave her a small nod, before she turned around again and walked down the tunnel - and all he did was watching how her silhouette grew smaller and smaller, until it finally disappeared completely.

Suddenly he realized why had felt the need to see her one last time: it wasn't to make her stay - it was to let her go.

And in that exact moment, he started to let her go.

It would be a lie to say that they were anywhere near happiness in that moment, and it would be an even bigger lie to claim that their feelings where gone, because they weren't. But maybe exactly this was the reason why they had decided to let each other go; because they still loved the other beyond limits and it went without saying that a person can love someone, but still chose to let them go.

Nobody knew what was going to happen in the future, and whether these two would ever encounter again - but in that moment, it felt like both of them were finally taking a step closer to getting over their past relationship.

Both of them knew the famous saying "If you love someone, you set them free. And if they really love you, they'll come back" and maybe - even after all this time - this would become true for Emily and Aaron at some point.

Maybe one day, but definitely not now. 

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Hello again!
So this it; the end of "Back to you - Hotchniss". I know that most of you would probably prefer another ending and I swear that I actually planned to give them a happy ending - but it just didn't feel right to me after a while. Too much has happened between Emily and Aaron in this story and I feel like they need more time apart in order to heal again.

I'm really sorry if the ending disappointed you!

Nevertheless, I still hope that y'all enjoyed reading this story and I am beyond thankful for all the votes and comments, every single one of them makes my day!

A new story is already in progress and I cannot wait to share it with you soon.

So see you in the next story, stay safe everyone!

- jisbons