Selene

Chapter 8

“You done, Selene?” dinig kong tanong ni Jana sa labas.

“Oo,” sagot ko.

Lumabas ako mula sa banyo. Still trying to tie my hair, but stop eventually. Hindi ko maitali ng maayos dahil sa nanghihina pa ang katawan ko at nanginginig pati kalamnan ko.

I huffed. Tinignan ko si Jana. “Aalis na ba tayo?” Tanong ko.

Tumango siya. “Hm. Kailangan mo ng tulong?” sabay turo sa buhok ko.

Agad akong umiling. Inayos ko nalang ang buhok ko, leaving it worn down. Tutal, hindi naman buhaghag ang buhok ko at maayos parin kahit na hindi talian, hinayaan ko nalang.

My hair is natural. Bagsak na bagsak ito na parang pina salon kapag tinitigan at hawakan becuase of it's smoothness and I got praised by everyone because of my hair. Which, when I was younger, but now... it stopped. Those praises stopped and replaced by untruthful words.

“Hindi na. I'll just leave it like this.”

She nod. “Ok then, let's go.”

Tumango ako. Nauna siyang lumabas. Agad akong sumunod sa kanya after grabbing the bag Jana brought and my medical papers.

Pagkalabas, a white and plain hallway fill in my eyes at mga kwartong nakalinya sa magkabilang gilid. A typical hospital, I think. Lumiko kami pakanan at nakita ko ang isang glass door palabas. Behind it, was a brown and green scenery.

Muntik na akong matumba ng biglang nawalan ng pandama ang isang binti ko. Dahilan para mapadaing ako.

Nanlaki ang mata ni Jana ng napalingon ito sakin at mabilis akong dinaluhan.

“Oh my god! Ok ka lang, Selene? Shit! Sorry, naging mabilis ang paglakad ko. I forgot that you just got out at hindi pa fully recover ang katawan mo!” Natarantang niyang saad. Hinawakan niya ang magkabilang braso ko at inalalayan na tumayo.

Umiling ako. “Hindi. Ok lang. Nanibago lang siguro ang binti ko. For three consecutive days of lying and resting probably my nerves are still asleep, kaya nawalan ako ng balanse.”

Huminga siya ng malalim, her forehead ceased a bit like she's relieved. Nagulat ata sa biglaang pangyayari.

Me too. Hindi ko alam na mamanhid ang binti ko. My muscles were aching. I should've excercise before we leave.

“Just tell me kung hindi mo na kaya, we'll stop until you will feel good.”

“Hindi. Ok lang talaga. We should proceed masyado na akong nakaabala sa'yo. You have responsibilities and yet ako ang inaatupag mo. I felt like i've taken your time from it. Nakakahiya na.”

Alam kong nagmamagandang loob lang siya, pero hindi ko parin maiwasan ang mahiya at mailang. She has work to do and responsibities to mend, pero heto... she's mending mine—me. Hindi naman niya ako responsibilidad at hindi ko rin siya ka-ano ano ngunit nandito siya nakaalalay, like she's one of my close friends, my family.

Family...hindi ko na alam kung meron pa ba ako no'n. Dahil ang pamilyang natira sa'kin at alam ko ay kinamumunghian ako.

He loathed me to death and I guess, he doesn't sees me as one. He only sees me as a kriminal who murdered his wife,
nothing else.