What Anxiety Feels Like (DNF/ Dream not found angst)

I can't Breathe

George was now on his couch staring at his tv. He was able to get himself out of his bed for a cup of tea.

It bad been around 6 hours now since he started to ignore everything. His phone was in his hand now but he ignored every single notification.

Honestly, he was shocked the amount of his friends that kept texting him. Even ones he wouldn't consider close tried to reach out. It made him feel the slightest bit better that they cared.

That is, if he wasn't missing the most important person. Dream had not texted him since he stopped calling around 10 hours ago. It didn't just bother George it hurt him.

There was no way he was still sleeping which meant he had to be ignoring him. He expected it but really wished it didn't happen. Deep down he hoped that Dream would call him and tell him everything was going to be okay. Sadly what he feared most ended up happening. He scared Dream away.

There was a movie on his TV that he hadn't listened to a word of. Hell, he didn't even know what was on. His mind was too busy wondering a million miles a second. He had a blue blanket wrapped around his shoulders and the cup of tea in his trembling hands.

He was breathing just fine yet it felt like every breath was painful to take with the heaviness that laid on his chest.

He just could not believe how much he had messed up. Or even worse how much he had been messing up recently. He was always so good at concealing what changed?

He had given in and scrolled through twitter and YouTube. He's not going to lie- he re watched the video of Dream leaving the call a lot of times. Something about the fear in his voice made George almost believe Dream would really care.

However, his no new missed calls or texts said other wise.

But the worst part was what he found on youtube. There were compilations made after the incident. Complications of all the times George had acted really strange on someone's stream. Basically all the times he had to quickly leave because of an incoming attack.

He cringed at the sound of his shortened breaths and the way he gasped too loudly on one stream. It was so obvious that something was wrong. Some people guessed it already and sent him support. Others denied it and yelled at them for implying things like that.

Stressed, George curled into himself. He set down his cup of tea on the table and put his phone besides him. He brought his legs close to his chest and rested his head on his knees.

He was just so overwhelmed. His body still ached from the attack and his mind ached just as much with everything that was going. Silent tears started to softly stream down his face. He just wanted someone there to comfort him. For once in his life he just wanted to feel safe.

His phone lit up again and he didn't look at it assuming it was one of his friends who have been texting him again. However, when it lit up again he mindlessly reached over. His eyes immediately widened when he saw the name that popped up.

It was dream.

he texted simple words- 'pick up my phone call' and a few seconds later 'please'

Before George could fully register it his phone started to ring. he quickly sat up on his coach and watched it for a few seconds. he should ignore it. He wasn't ready to talk to him but- oh how much he wanted to.

Abandoning any rational thought, he picked it up scaring himself in the process. What does he think he's doing??? His breathing picked up. He had no clue what Dream was going to say or think.

There was a moment of silence once the call connected. Neither of them said anything and George felt like he was going to pass out with anticipation. Was Dream going to leave him now?