OS #1: Chain Of Restrictions

16th Restriction

Finally

"Talk about what, Hugh?" I looked at him, eyes full of questions for his sudden intruding.

He walked towards me slowly, intense eyes staring at me. Mahina akong napaatras.

He should learn how to freaking stay put! What are we even going to talk about?

Sa patuloy na pag-atras ko, di ko namalayan na nasa gilid na pala ako ng aking higaan. Napatingin ako sa kanya, who's still approaching. Wala akong magawa kundi ang mapaupo sa aking higaan. Ramdam ko ang kabang bumubuo sa aking dibdib.

"H-Hu-"

"Baby."

Napatigil ako sa paghinga when I heard him said that. Sinong tinutukoy niya sa 'baby'? He kneeled his left leg in front of me, and held my face to make me look at him.

"Are you jealous?" What he said made me look at him, eyes wide open.

Paan-

"I heard your conversation with Jane. Is that why you're so cold with me?" Nanlaki ang aking mga mata at hindi alam kung ano ang isasagot. He gently held my left hand napatingin naman ako sa kanya.

"Baby, we can't have a proper conversation, if I'm the only one who's talking." He gently moves some strands of my hair that's blocking my face.

"Tell me." When I looked straight into his eyes, in its depths I saw sadness on it.

Bakit siya malungkot? I turned my back for the second time because of him! He even choose Jane over me. But what's with that fucking reaction? Parang ako pa ang may kasalanan.

Di ko mapigilang mairita sa nakikita. I already admit to myself na gusto ko siya. But whenever he entertains Jane, 'di ko mapigilang magalit sa kanya.

And what? Baby? Fuck him.

Tumayo ako at naglakad palapit sa veranda, dahilan ng pagka kabitiw ng hawak niya sa akin. Tanaw ko ang tahimik na lugar namin. The moon is illuminating a bright light, making me remember how we used to be.

We have been siblings for almost 12 years, nasanay ako na ako lang ang binibigyan niya ng pansin. He spoiled me with his fucking attention. Kaya, when Jane suddenly appeared and tries to steal it. It just... doesn't felt nice. I hate it.

"Jane? Yeah right." I scoff roughly. Nilingon ko siya, kitang kita sa aking mga mata na nasaktan ako at nasasaktan pa rin. Tumayo siya at lalapit na sana when I signaled him don't.

"Why does it have to be her? I mean it's also not fine with other girls too. H-Hugh, I... it's hard for me to contain this within me, alright. You started advancing on me, making me feel various emotions, at di ko alam kung paano to. Because I saw you as my brother..." I saw his lips slightly parted. Napansin ko rin ang kanyang panghihina at pagkabigo. But he still looks at me, kahit na kitang kita ko ang lahat sa kanya ngayon.

"But these emotions made me look at you in a different and opposite way. I didn't notice that what I felt weird before was turning into affection. What I've been keeping to myself is slowly coming out. 'Di ko mapigilan. Lalo na't when you met Jane you just... change." Ramdam ko sa aking mukha ang mga luha na ngayon ay nasa aking mukha na. Luha na noon ay pinipigilan kong tumulo. I finally opened and said it.

"I like you, Hugh. And this might seem crazy, but I do. I-"

"Damn it, baby. I like you too." He takes large steps and pulled me for a sudden hug. Natigilan naman ako sa pagsasalita. Ramdam ko ang pagbilis ng tibok ng puso ko. Natigil sa pagluha ang aking mga mata, as surprise enveloped me. Nanginginig ang aking labi sa biglaang pagdaloy ng kiliti sa buo kong katawan.