Money, Jokes, and War (Sans x Reader)

Chapter 21:

TW: panic attack

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It has been a week or so since you've been out of the hospital, and lucky for you! Your brother has been a pain in the ass. Sure, it's sweet and all that he cares enough about you to help you with every little thing, but has he ever heard of privacy? You haven't gotten a moment alone to think things over with him being so attached to your bedside.

Right, bedside. This whole "bedrest" thing was eating at your nerves. You had shit you wanted to do, or sorta stuff you wanted to do.It was probably because you weren't allowed to go anywhere that you wanted to go everywhere. 

STILL.

You hauled your laptop back onto your legs and slouched over your homework once again. You had a shit ton of stuff to catch up on, and a lot of recorded lectures to take notes on. "Careful!"

You rolled your eyes and pressed play. Your psychology teacher was the worst, Mrs. Serthine had the voice of a comical character in a children's cartoon from the 50s. She was a good teacher and made the work easy to understand, but her voice was almost hell to listen to. After your brothers oh so lovely reminder, you threw your headphones in to listen better.

Over the week you've been out of the hospital you've recovered quite a lot. The burns on your back had healed a lot more, so they were closer to an annoyance than anything else right now. You had completely recovered from your mild concussion and your family could not stop you from being on your laptop now. Though even with your healing, that night still bothered you.

Not just in the way that it was traumatizing-- in the way that it feels like it shouldn't have happened. Something feels so wrong about it happening, like it simply shouldn't have ended like that. You felt like there was something you could have done to change the ending of that night. And what the fuck was that weird floaty space thing. You had looked into it before, with other stories of victims-- but they didn't have the same experience.

Well, you had ran into some similarities, but nothing that was as real as yours. You can usually tell when something is a "dream" or some sort of unconscious reality. Not, not being wide awake and feeling your entire being freezing. You don't feel pain in dreams, and that freeze practically burned you. Hah, ironic.

You've also noticed how cynical you've become, with the little thoughts you think or little jokes you make it's all cynical. It's like you've lost all hope, though you know you haven't. Right? You're still here kicking about and quite literally doing schoolwork. You... you haven't given up. This one experience won't make you give up.

You shook your head and went back to writing down notes on the lecture you were watching. You had refused to pay too much attention to your thoughts as of late-- they were all about that night and you refused to indulge them. Everytime you did, all it ended with was silent tears so as to not disturb your brother. It was weird realizing how much he cared for you, and vice versa. Mark was usually such a stoic guy, he took after your father in that.

Hell, seeing him with even this much emotion made your soul feel brighter-- no, it does not matter that it still sunk low and was dimmed and cracked-- it was sweet. You practically glowed when he first started giving you little reminders to be careful or to eat or drink. He even reminded you when it was time to redress your burns. Until he just did not stop. You tried to give him hints, but he just either didn't get them or ignored them.

"Y/N you need to eat, your class can wait. You've been playing catch up all week come on." Mark said and shoved a plate of food in front of you. You glared up at him,

"I need to finish these notes and then I'll eat, I promise dude." you were losing your patience. Being babied was making this all so much harder and you would kill for some alone time to even try and focus on your work. Your brother was being so kind and you appreciated that so much, but fuck off.