With you - Sanders sides human! AU - Book 1

Chapter 54 (Roman's POV)

When I got out of the restaurant I had to make an incredible amount of work just so I didn't break down in tears. I knew I had done the right thing. I knew that breaking up with Virgil was for the best. For a greater good. His happiness meant the world to me. But I couldn't stop the feeling of missery. I was miserable. I was selfish for feeling this way, for wanting him back just a few seconds after the breakup. 

Come on Roman! I told myself, Stop being such a drama queen!  You'll be happier in no time. You just have to let it go. But right now, you have to be strong. You can't let your emotion flood you and start crying in the middle of the street. Becuase Virgil is still close. He's just a few meters away. And if he sees you like this he's going to hate himself the pain that you are feeling. So stop being such a baby

And I did. I took a deep breat, closed my eyes, and when opening them once again a smile curved my face. Was it fake? of course. Did it hurt? obviously. Was it worth it? yes.

The walk back to the dorms was the longest I ever made because with each step I felt as if the earth was pulling me down close to it's core, and my strenght was weaker until the point where I arrived to my room, where I just collapsed in my bed. 

Tears started to flow from my eyes, but they where silent and soft ones. I didn't make a sound, I just waited there, feeling numb, time becoming blurry around me and making it unable to know if I had spent minutes or days lying in bed. I just felt the salty little tears falling down my face. 

My phone buzzed once. Then again. And again. And it continued to buzz with the income of more and more text messages, but I ignored them. I didn't have the will to take it out of my pocket and read the messages. I just couldn't.

Suddently, the door opened. I "rolled" out of bed, as Virgil liked to define it, so I wouldn't face the door and I had time to whipe off the shedded tears. 

"Roman... It's me, Patton," He said.

"Hello Padre!" I exclaimed, faking another smile so he wouldn't worry about me. 

"Roman, you don't have to cover up your feeling around me," Patton's eyes where filled with sadness and compasion, "I know what happened, Virgil told me,"

"I- I, oh," My voice cracked and I sat down in the bed again, covering my face with my hands.

Patton tapped my shoulder, and I lifted my head to be greeted by his conforting smile

"I brought icecream. I know it helps you feel better when you are down. Also, you didn't end up eating much, so I asumed you where hungry," He explained. 

"Thanks," I whispered.

The afternoon passed both fast but slow at the same time. Every minute took forever to end, but the sky turned dark before I was able to process the time that had passed. 

Patton stayed with me all this time, in a similar way that we both had stayed with Virgil when he found out so much time ago that Logan was dating someone else. Why? Why did the universe have to remind me of that time? Why couldn't I just be strong? Why couldn't I act like a real prince, why can't I be brave enough and face the concequences of my actions? 

It's difficult to know, difficult to understand, but there is something keeping me going. And that something is my certaincy that I've done the right thing. If I wouldn't be so sure about this fact, I wouldn't know what to do.

FEEL THE PAIN!!!!!!!!! HEHEHEHEHEHE!!!

FEEL THE SUFERING OF OUR FALLEN PRINCE! FEEL HIS SADNESS FLOOD YOU AND MAKE YOU FEEL SORRY FOR HIM!

(I'm talking to the ones that hated on Roman when he was still dating Virge, just because they where dating. I hope you understand that he meant no harm)

ANd for the ones who don't hate on Roman... Well, I just like angst and all of this, ok? It's fun. 

And until the next time, take it easy guys gals and non binary pals!