I never thought I'm brave enough to stand this.
" Ah! Sino ka naman?" tanong ni Idong saken. Maamo pa rin ang kanyang mukha kahit na namamantsahan na ng dugo ang kanyang mga kamay at damit.
My eyes routed on the dead bodies on the floor.
The villagers who welcomed us with smiles are now dead. Twenty of them are dead.
And one of them, has her blood splattered on my face.
It stings inside but I never thought this day would come. This day when I could successfully hold my tears back without an effort.
" Ikaw ba ang sumira sa plano namin? Ikaw ba ang dahilan kung bakit kailangan kong patayin ang sarili kong mga magulang? "
He cried.
And it became clear to me.
This man did all those filthy acts to protect the people he loves. He was tormented. He was pushed in the corner. He too, is battling against his self.
" Sana pinatay mo ako nung gabing yun," nanginginig niyang wika.
Mahina siya. At ang kahinaang yun ang dahilan kung bakit hindi niya nagawa ang tama. Ang kahinaang yun ang dahilan kung bakit nya naranasan ang sakit na siya mismo ang nagdala.
If he only tried to fight, things would have been different. Pero hindi ko naman sya masisisi.
Players are not born. We are made.
" Patayin mo na rin ako. Marami akong ginawang kasalanan. Mali lahat ng desisyong ginawa ko. Marami akong nasaktan. Marami akong buhay na sinira. Inakala ko na kahit papano, isa sa mga desisyong yun ay tama at ikakasiya ko." Humagulgol siya ng iyak. " Pero mali ulit ako. Walang silbi ang lahat."
" Pigilan mo ang kasamaan ko. Wala na akong karapatang mabuhay. Patayin mo na ako, pakiusap."
I took my folded sword and swung it in the air. The swishing sound made me reminisce Commandment's word back when he trained me.
"The worst punishment is the punishment you get from yourself. It kills you slowly and you yourself could not make it stop."
I dropped the sword on the floor.
" Hindi sapat ang kamatayan bilang kaparusahan. Use that sword to cut your arm, along with the chains of past that bind you. Wag mong ipasa sa iba lahat ng tungkulin mo. Ikaw dapat ang pumigil sa sarili mo. Ikaw dapat ang magtama sa lahat ng kamaliang ikaw mismo ang may gawa."
The smell of blood filled the air. I lowered my gaze to meet his eyes.
" Cut your arm as a promise, that you would never do the same mistake. Sa dami ng buhay na sinira mo, magligtas ka ng isa. At piliin mong iligtas ang sarili mo."
This is my belief. Whether it's right or wrong, I will figure it out soon.
" You need to live to atone for your sins."
With his trembling hands, he lift the sword with his left hand. I observed him for long to know that he's right - handed. If he would choose to cut his right arm, it means he's determined to carry the weight of his sins.
But before he could do so, he took something in his pocket.
" Isang bagay lang ang posibleng dahilan ng pagpunta mo dito. Ito."
Sinalo ko ang inihagis niyag flash drive saken.
" Nariyan na lahat ng katotohanan. Paparating na sina Don Samuel dito kaya umalis ka na." he tightened his grip of the sword. "Sana sa susunod nating pagkikita, pwede na kitang makilala."
