Who Would Have Thought

Chapter 4

Flashback

He had left early. He had given a surgery away and headed home early. Which was probably kind of stupid, as he was an intern and the last thing an intern should be doing is leaving early. But still, he had left. He had walked away from work because she would be home. She would be home and she would need him there and that was reason enough to leave early. His Meredith needed him.

Things were getting worse. A month ago, he hadn't thought it would be possible for things to get worse, but they were. She was working longer shifts at the bar, sometimes not getting back to the apartment until three in the morning, if at all. The test results had come back in for her mom today, but he didn't know what they said, only that the doctors were thinking things were worse after the last surgery.

Which was crap, this whole situation was crap. Months ago they had been so happy. Walking around Europe together, holding hands, kissing everywhere, having sex everywhere, he was pretty sure he had never been that happy before in his life. He was in love. He was madly in love. He still was. But now everything was hard. Everything was beginning to feel too big.

But he had taken the day off. He was here. He was taken the night off to take care of her, to get her to talk. She didn't talk much, she was Meredith, she never talked about what was going on in her head, but he couldn't just let her not talk anymore. She was starting to scare him. She was losing weight, drinking too much, she wasn't sleeping. He had to help her.

"Meredith? You here?" he called as he let himself into his apartment.

"Hmmm," he heard her sigh from the couch.

"Hey," he smiled, or attempted to smile. She looked terrible. She looked like she was barely holding it all together.

"Hi," she murmured, reaching for the tequila bottle on the coffee table.

"How are you doing?" he asked. Stupid question. He knew it was a stupid question but he didn't know what else to say.

"Fine."

"Mer..."

"I'm fine, Derek."

"You can talk to me, you know."

"There's nothing to talk about," she murmured.

"There's a lot to talk about," he sighed.

"I'm fine," she snapped and then took a deep breath. "You're home early."

"Yeah, he nodded, smiling gently. "Wanted to see my girlfriend."

"Oh," she nodded carefully.

"Thought I could make us a nice meal. Have some wine."

"I'm not really hungry, Derek."

"Mer, you have to eat."

"I ate earlier."

"Why do I not believe you?"

"I ate at the bar, Derek."

"What did you have?"

"Food."

"You didn't eat," he sighed.

"I ate."

"You haven't been eating, Mer," Derek frowned. "You haven't been eating or sleeping and you definitely haven't been talking to me."

"I'm fine."