poems for you. always for you. ✓

u n t i t l e d

my words

always stick

to my tongue

like sickeningly sweet

caramel

before

hesitantly unsticking

and tumbling

from my mouth,

haltingly leaving

the refuge

of my mind

to shatter

to the ground

in a myriad

of colors and wonders

no one gets to see

whole

before they fall

short

of the ears

they can't reach

no one likes

stuttered words

and welled up eyes—

so i've learned to leave

the tears

for later,

because my

jumbled words

and weakly

pantomiming hands

are enough to cue

the pity

everyone seems

to have buckets of

and i hate hearing

"take your time"

because i'm afraid

of taking your

fucking time

and the more

i think

the more

my mouth

rambles

the more

i stumble

over sentences

the less

i am heard,

the less

i begin to be,

and i step back

to melt into

the dark shadows

of silence

i'm in a rambling mood tonight. what's new.

i also hate how i stutter through everything. fucking everything. it's frustrating.

edit: i wrote this while i was angry at myself so please excuse the lack of finesse in this one.

love,

mari