Aera

Kpop News

When I read the news and articles sent to me. I immediately called Seunghyun but he didn't answer.

I felt horrible, he was receiving so much hate online.

Of course, what he did was bad but it wasn't as bad as everyone makes it out to be in my opinion.

Or maybe I just grew up around it.

Back in America, it's kind of expected of rappers to smoke and drink and all of that.

But here in Korea, that meant everything.

Now people think he's a bad person?

Just for smoking marijuana?

Come on people.

It's not like he was actively promoting it.

Like hey kids, go smoke marijuana!

It was something done in his private time.

And though I agree it wasn't the best thing to do, he is still a person who makes faults like everyone else. 

Should anyone receive death threats over said faults? No, no they shouldn't.

I grab my purse not bothering to change my pajamas and as I was about to leave to Seunghyun Oppa's place Jisoo puts a stop to it.

"No Aria!" Jisoo goes to stand in front of the door.

I give her a face of anger and annoyance which causes Jisoo to take a deep breath.

"Right now there will be reporters all over him, the last thing he needs is his junior rushing over to his private place to comfort him at this time of night" Jisoo then shakes her head. "It will only cause more stories to arise and hurt his reputation further".

Upon hearing Jisoo's situation I quickly realize how I could have also hurt his reputation by making an irrational choice and disobeying rules.

Going over to his place right now would cause stories and our difference in age would surely be another negative topic of discussion.

I sigh and drop my purse on the ground.

"He's not answering me," I say feeling tears in my eyes.

"I'm worried about him" I start fully crying now.

Jisoo pulls me into a hug while I let it all out.

I felt horrible that there was nothing I could do.

I couldn't scream out to the world that he was a good person like I wanted to.

I couldn't do anything.

I was scared.

I didn't know his mindset.

What if he becomes depressed?

What if he does something stupid?

When I hear a door opening I don't bother to look but continue to cry on Jisoo's shoulder.

"I know some of the Oppas are with him now," Jennie says lowly in a whisper.

I feel a little better hearing that, but not enough to ease my guilt for not showing up for him.

Jisoo sets me down on the couch where I tell her all of my worries and frustrations.

After a little while, Jisoo was able to calm me down.

And put me back in a stable mood.

After an hour since my last phone call.

I make one last effort to call him and when I think he's not going to answer he finally picks up.

"Oppa!" I say jumping up from the couch while running to my room for privacy.

"I'm sorry" Is all I hear from him followed by crying.

"Don't" I say my voice breaking at hearing his sadness and his own voice crack. "Don't apologize for being human and experimenting with something"

When I hear him break down and cry, I curse myself out, not knowing the right words to say.

"I hope you know there are still people here who love you and stand by you." I begin to say. "Deep down in your heart, you're a great person" knowing Seunghyun's true self. He's actually a sensitive person who cares for anyone he meets. On the outside, he comes off as the funny careless guy. But I know the real Seunghyun and it sucks that others don't get to see that side of him.

When I hear Seunghyun Oppa stop crying and I hear him collecting his breath, I feel slightly relaxed and start to bring up some of our funniest memories together.

When I hear him laughing for real, I feel satisfied and continue on talking to him for the next hour.

Upon hearing him say goodnight in a barely audible whisper I know he's ready to sleep. 

We end the call but I made sure to tell him how much I loved him and would be here for him.

I'm not sure how much of that he retained because he was so tired.

But if he feels like everyone hates him, I will make sure to be that one person he knows loves him.

He can regroup from this.

He has to...

He's my strong and favorite Oppa.