Temptation 2: Forgiving You ✔️

35: Always

My stomach is turning by the time I make it to the door.  Imagining his face when I realize I'm about to break him is a living nightmare that I'm about to endure. Why? Why did I fall for him? I knew from the moment I met him something was bound to happen. My mother used to tell that you never only love one person in your life, sometimes I wish she was wrong. After all it would save me from the heartbreak, and the pain I've caused them.

As the door opens, he greets me with a smile, "Hey, just in time I ordered Chinese. Figured you would be hungry." He tells me as he moves out of the way. Even if I wanted to pretend that everything was okay, in the next five minutes it wouldn't even matter.

"Right, uh that's sweet of you. First I need to talk to you about something." I make my way over to the couch and I take a seat. I avoid looking at him, only because I know it's going to hurt.

"Sure what's up?"

I take in a breath, trying to make sure I don't lose it right here. This could end well, or this can end badly, and I don't think I can handle that.

"You know that no matter what, I will always love you, right?" I ask him, this time forcing myself to look him in the face. I can't be a coward, not now.

He nods his head, and I continue. "You're my bestfriend, and I've always known that deep down I was always going to fall for you one day or another, even if I tried to stop myself, hell it happened."

His eyes move up towards the ceiling, and he looks away for a moment, "Yeah I know.."

I begin to bounce my leg up and down before biting down on my lip as my eyes water, "You are by far the best thing that has ever happened to me, and I will love you always." I sharply intake a breath, my voice starting to break, "But I love him too, and I can't pretend like every single part of me doesn't want a life with him. And I know that I put you through hell, even though you tell me otherwise, and I'm so sorry for doing this to you, but I can't keep giving you hope that this will last."

Releasing all of that lifted some sort of weight off of me, but the guilt remained. It didn't disappear.

Damon sighed, "You know I've dreaded this moment. I told myself everyday that even though I know you're in love with him, I would have a chance, and I did."

I look up at him, the tears still stinging my eyes.

"You've made this past month one of the best parts of my life. Even if we didn't have forever, I had you, and that seemed to be like the biggest accomplish of my entire existence, to know I was loved by you."

Immediately I burst into tears, "I'm sorry Damon, I really am. I just—"

"He's the love of your life, no matter how many people you date, he will always be that. Your love for each other runs deeper than any of us can understand. But no matter what, before we dated we were best friends,  that won't change."

I didn't understand. Why isn't he angry? Sometimes I forget that he's not some complete Dick I happen to know, he was one of the good ones.

As I continue to cry he pulls me into a hug and holds me tightly.

"You will always be my epic love, Leah. Always."
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