his star

𝐈

𝐀𝐝𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚

I wonder, if someone will ever look at me the way I look at the night sky. I wonder, if someone will choose me out of a billion, just like I choose to look at this one specific star, even though I have unlimited other options. I wonder, if someone will choose me to be the brightest star to their darkness.

I don't really know what time it is, but it feels like I've been sitting on this balcony for hours. This cold night breeze calms me down and I somehow find my inner peace when I'm staring at the white dots on the never ending blackness above me. Not many people I know understand, how much the night sky means to me. Every day I go outside at this time, I find the stars shining down at me. They are always at their right place and even though I'm sitting here on my own, I don't feel alone.

"Adhara? What are you doing out there, come inside." I hear Pansy's sleepy voice coming from inside her room. "I was just admiring the beauty of the night." I say with a slight smile. Pansy grabs me by my hand and leads me the way to her bed, where we both lie down.

She is the one person, who is always there for me. I know, that I can trust her completely and it makes me feel safe.

"Are you okay? You know, if you want to-" 

"I'm fine, no need to worry. I just needed a break from all my thoughts. It helps me clear my mind when I'm out there, but I'm fine. I promise."

She doesn't say anything else as an answer. She just takes my hand, squeezes it tightly and then she lets go. She always does that; It's her way to comfort me and it's better than any words, because she gives me the feeling, that she is here and that she always will be. I guess it's just how you do it, when you have been best friends with someone since the beginning. You know, when to use your words or when it would be better to just show the other, that you are here.

Pansy is already asleep and I decide, that it's time to close my eyes now too.

__

After Pansy and I finished eating breakfast, we go back to her room and she finishes packing her trunk. I've already packed mine, before I left to stay the rest of the holidays at Pansy's.

"Do you think I look good in that outfit?" she asks me, while she admires her butt in the mirror. "Sexy as hell! Blaise will love it!" I answer her and I see her eyes widen, when the words leave my mouth. "Blai- Why are you saying that?"

"Oh come on! We are like the same person, do you think I wouldn't notice, when you are in love?" the only thing I get as a response is a frown and I do nothing but smile.

"Girls, we need to leave now or you'll miss the train!" Penelope, Pansy's mother, screams from downstairs, so we make our way down to the living room, where the fireplace is.

After we travelled to Diagon Alley by floo powder and finally arrived at platform 9 3/4, Penelope hugs us goodbye and Pansy and I leave her mother behind and we enter the Hogwarts Express.

Seeing all these happy and excited first-years, makes me miss my first ride ever on the train. I think, I've never been more nervous than I was at this day. Before I entered the Hogwarts Express 5 years ago, father gave me this one thing, that grew to be my most valuable possession. A black jar. At first, I thought he was joking, because what could I possibly do with it? I know now and it makes me almost laugh out loud when I'm thinking about my clueless 10 year old self. Before I can continue reliving my past, Pansy's voice snaps me back to reality.

"Adhi, are you listening to me? I'm talking to you and you've never answered me. Everyone probably thinks I'm barking mad, because I'm talking to myself!" The way she looks at me makes me chuckle, on which she hits my arm in frustration.