“Okay so I don’t have a toothbrush for you, so uh, let’s just skip that. You’re fine you’re four, your teeth are going to fall out anyway. Um what else…. Pajamas um…. Hold on.”
Crossing over to my suitcase I pulled out Green Day t-shirt and handed it to Cooper who was watching me curiously. Taking the shirt in his hands, he looked up at me and blinked.
“What?” I demanded, wishing Grace, who was currently living in LA had decided to stay the night instead of going back to her place, “Do you not know how to dress yourself.”
Holding his barbies in one hand and the shirt in the other he continued to stare up at me in confusion.
“I can’t take your clothes of.” I sighed, “That’s weird I don’t know where the line is between baby and big kid and parents seeing your naked body and all that shit so just… here I’ll show up.”
Pulling of my shirt I tossed it to the floor, and pulled on the 5SOS t-shirt I usually wore to bed.
“Your turn.” I said slowly.
Bending down, Cooper gently set down his Barbies before straightening up. Slowly, he unzipped his rain coat and let it fall to the ground at his feet.
“Now the shirt.” I coxed.
Slipping his small fingers under the hem of his ‘Mommy’s Little Monster’ shirt he pulled it over his head.
“Good.” I praised, “Now put this one on.”
Taking the shirt, I held out to him, he pulled the much too large shirt over his head and looked down at it as it puddle around his ankles.
“Now ditch the pants.” I said.
Squinting he focused on my mouth and leaned forward.
Sighing, I reached out and hooking my finger in the belt loop of hit little jeans pulled him over to me. Unsnapping and unzipping his pants I then pulled them down leaving him in a pair of little Thomas the Tank Engine boxers.
“Okay Good.” I sighed, watching as he picked up his Barbie’s, “You’re too young for zits so I guess we don’t need to wash your face… Do you have to pee?”
Frowning he looked up at me.
“You know.” I grumbled, pointing to my crotch then his, then the bathroom, “Pee.”
Nodding slowly, he handed me his Barbies before trotting over to the bathroom, and leaving the door open sat down on the toilet.
“Are you taking a dump?” I demanded.
Ignoring me, he kicked his legs back and forth before the air was filled with a soft tinkling.
“Really?” I asked, “Dude, sitting and peeing is like…. Being able to stand and piss is what being a man is all about.”
Wordlessly, Cooper climbed off the toilet and after pulling up his underwear walked back over to me. Stopping infront of me he held out his hands expectantly, waiting for me to give back the dolls.
“Aren’t you forgetting something?” I asked.
He blinked.
“Flush the toilet.” I sighed.
He cocked his head to the side.
Kneeling down I very slowly and deliberately said, “Cooper Flush the toilet.”
His eyes widened in recognition before he shook his head.
“What do you mean no?” I laughed, “For the time being we’re bunking together, you’re my roomy, I can’t have you pissing and leaving it. I know some people say if it’s yellow let it mellow but that’s gross. In the house of Hood, we flush.”
