Aim: Hydra | Y/N Story | Sequel to "Aim: Avenger"

13. Attachment

I laid on my bed, staring straight at the ceiling, trying to fall asleep. "Ugh, fine. Might as well be useful." I grumbled, sitting up. On nights like these, I slip on my suit and patrol. I guess Peter has been a good influence in that regard.

My eyes bounced around the dark landscape, not sure what I was looking for. Nothing looked amiss, so I touched down gently on the roof of "Delmar's." Peter loved it here, and was very close with the store owner. I found it comforting, a place of good memories. I thought about that one evening we spent eating gummy worms and stopping crime together. I laughed to myself at my reaction to the sweet. Peter is just so easy to hang out with.

"He is, isn't he?" V spoke, making me jump.

"God I hate when you that," I mumbled, turning my attention back to the city below me. 

"You know, Peter's a pretty good influence for you. Teaching you to be good." Ben appeared, plopping down next to me. "I like him."

"And he's not going to hurt you; he likes you too much." V sat on my other side, letting her legs dangle over. "He's a much better friend than we are."

"No, don't say that; you guys have been with me since forever," I argued, looking at her.

"I'm just saying that he shares a much happier world with you than we do. I mean, we killed together; you save people with him."

"She's got a point, you know. We're reminders of all the bad stuff in your past. Maybe it's time to move on." Ben chimed in.

"Move on to what? A normal life?" I scoffed.

"That is what you wanted."

"Yeah, what I want, not what will happen. Let's be realistic for a second, guys; if I go after Hydra, then I'm probably going to die. I've made my peace with that."

"Then why did you say you'd retire after all this?"

"Because it's good to have dreams, right? No matter how unrealistic." I looked down at my hands, clenched into fists. "I'm just so tired. Tired of everything. I feel . . . conflicted on which side is right. Sure, Hydra wasn't great compared to what Peter's childhood was like, but whatever; it was home. And then came the Avengers, and with them a weird sense of togetherness I'd never felt before. A family. Hydra said that the Avengers were bad, but how could they be? And the team said that Hydra was bad, but I still don't understand that part. We had good memories there."

"But that's the difference between the two; we're gone, Y/N. Those memories are in the past. The team? They're what you can still have."

"I still have you two, though. You're literally talking to me." I pointed out.

"Y/N. We are dead. The Avengers aren't. Peter isn't. Maybe you don't go back to them right away, but please. Spend more time with Peter, let him help you."

"No! He could get hurt, and I won't allow that."

He sighed. "So could you!"

"So what? The only people who would care are, as you put it, dead!"

"You know that's not true, Y/N. Remember how happy Bucky was to see you?"

"He'd never know, he'd just think I retired like I said I would."

"And what about Peter? He'd be worried if you never came home."

"I've known him for a few months, he'd get over it." I stood up, dusting myself off, and walked away from the ledge. 

"Y/N. Y/N!" Ben called.

"Can't hear you, I'm fighting crime," I called back.

Sighing, he answered, "There's nothing around!"

"That's why I'm looking!" As if on cue, sounds of a struggle started on the next block, and I flew off as I left the two ghosts behind.

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They're right, Peter would probably mourn me. But that's not my fault, he shouldn't have gotten attached so fast. Maybe I shouldn't have let him get too close, it hasn't exactly worked out great for everyone else. Ugh, people are so complex, I hate it. I was sitting in the living room, struggling to focus on the mess of the maps, plans, and intelligence I'd collected. Another interruption pulled me out of my current distraction in the form of a key turning in my door, and a certain high schooler poked his head into my apartment. "Hey Y/N, school's out. Want to go on patrol?"

I wanted to refuse, but his stupid adorable smile was too bright to want to dim. "Sure, Bugsy."

"You're keeping that nickname?"

A smile split onto my face. "Yep."

"Whatever, Grab your suit and meet me at Delmar's!" His excitement caused me to chuckle as he left and locked the door behind him.

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