The Panic of Fear (Book One of The Fearful Trilogy)

Chapter Thirty

Oh fuck.

What?

I have to sneeze.

Oh fuck.

  Frost sneezes and I get thrown from his arms. The monster obviously shot him. I hit the ground and almost get shot. I lay there trying not to move. All I can think is. Is Frost okay?

Frost?

  Nothing.

FROST!

  I want to kill the monster. Either of them. Who cares if he has a heart? I'm tired of monsters. I'm tired of everything. I can't even move my legs anymore.
  I close my eyes and hope for the best. I start hearing creepy childlike laughter. Oh fuck. Not this bastard again. I open my eyes and see the giant smile.
  I try to find the electricity monster but I can't see it in the darkness. What the hell? Was that all an illusion? I try to reason with myself.
  The monster created everything. The other monster,the lab,everything was a lie. Even Frost? No. He couldn't be an illusion. He had a heart.
  I denied it as much as I could but in the end i knew it was true. Frost wasn't real. He was another illusion created by this bastard. I try to stand up but I can't.
  My legs not working is real. So fucking real it's gonna kill me. I want to cry. I can't help it as the tears fall down my face. I'm going to die. And it won't be fun.
  I try to crawl away but my useless legs are grabbed and I'm lifted up. I'm hanging upside down again. I fucking hate this. I turn to lean forward to free my legs but something wraps around my body pinning my arms to my sides.
  I feel like I'm in a cocoon. But it's going to kill me. I start thinking what a crappy life I had.

Abusive Father
Abused Mother
Dead Friend

  A life I wanted to leave behind. But it snuck up and screwed me over. The memories came at bad times. I'm surprised I've lived this long. I even flirted with something that wasn't real.
  How could I be so stupid? My life has no room for romance. What happened four years ago proved that. As the memory comes I embrace it.

Four years ago

  I wake up in the hospital feeling like I was hit by a truck. "Hey." I look over and see Jordan. Smiling I move my arm trying to grab his hand. He sees my hand moving and reaches out grabbing it.
  I can't help but feel happy. "Alex. I have bad news. Your father killed your mother and then shot himself." Jordan says it so fast I can barely register what he says.
  I start crying and he walks over laying next to me. He puts a hand in my hair playing with it. After I cry he lays his head on mine. "You can move in with us." He mumbles. "My mom and dad said it was okay."
  I look at him. "Really?" I rasp out. He smiles. "Yes." I wrap an arm around his waist and smile sadly. "I'll move in." I yawn and close my eyes.