-thirty-

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i got my first makeup
in 3rd grade.

it was a bright red lipstick
that my mother no longer
used.

i loved how it made my eyes pop,
and the way it made me look grown.

but now i'm too grown
for my liking,
and a new lipstick stains my
pillowcase from
the nights where i was too
depressed to take it off.

now i'm too grown,
and it sits on my vanity
waiting to be used
for another night of
pretending
i'm someone i'm not,
so someone will finally
love me,
for someone i'm not.
-L

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