Promise Me ➳ Taebin ✔

15. Promise Me

Date: May 25th

"This year has been great and... wait-" Soobin walked around Taehyun's room, writing different things down on a paper. "No, the last few years have been great. I've had great friends, and great teachers, and to be valedictorian is a huge honor."

He didn't know what to write. Unsurprisingly, he was valedictorian and Beomgyu was salutatorian. He didn't know what to write for his speech.

According to Beomgyu, the younger was mainly just making it a comedic speech, talking about his friends and how funny and extra they were.

But Soobin wanted to make it meaningful. So he spent hours writing it, finally falling asleep in the chair by Taehyun's bed at 1 a.m.

The next morning, he woke up to his alarm at eight. That gave him enough time to practice his speech over and over again, shower, get ready for the day and go out to lunch with the other three.

When he got back, he fixed his hair and put on his black suit, sitting on his bed and going on his phone for a little bit.

"You remember last summer?" The vision asked. Soobin just ignored it though. "You remember when you were dehydrated and had to go to the emergency room? When you got home, you saw a letter from Taehyun, but you threw it in your closet because you thought he didn't come visit you at all."

Soobin looked up and shrugged. "Yeah?"

"And... remember when he came back from Japan and told you that he had to go to an emergency funeral and he didnt find out you were in the hospital until he was already there? If he was in Japan, that means he wasn't there to visit you. But after you found out that's where he was, you already forgot about the note. Until now because... I'm in your head. Why don't you open it?"

Soobin never cleaned out his closet, so the note was probably still there. He quickly went to the closet and rummaged through everything until he found it.

He decided to go to Taehyun's house until the graduation ceremony, wanting to see him anyway one last time.

"When I was nineteen, you wrote this for me," he said, shutting the door. "But I never read it, and I'm sorry. I'll read it now."

He sat in the chair next to the bed and opened the envelope, taking a deep breath before reading it.

I'm literally so mad. I didn't even know this person, and while I'm at their funeral, I get a call from Yeonjun saying you're in the emergency room with a 104° fever? And now I can't come back because everybody's forcing me to stay here.

I can't sleep or eat. It's literally so stupid. Yeonjun keeps calling me and telling me you're okay, but he says you still have a fever and you're throwing up. I wish I was there. I love you so much. Why did this have to happen while I was gone? I'm so angry.

You don't like it while I'm angry. We don't like it when the other's angry haha. But it's just horrible. Knowing that while I'm here, writing this in the back corner of a strange party, you're lying in a hospital bed, suffering.

Soobin stopped reading and looked at Taehyun.

It was almost how he felt right now.

If your fever gets really bad... I don't know what I would do without you. Would I be able to live? I don't know. The thought terrifies me. What would happen to me if you ever left before me? You're not allowed to die before me Choi Soobin.

Soobin laughed a bit in between crying and shook his head.

"You're a bozo Taehyun," he said, looking at the boy. "You know you're not allowed to die before me."

To be honest, I keep crying. Just the thought of having to be here without you is terrifying.

"Tell me about it," Soobin shook his head.

When can I see you again? Will you still be in the hospital by the time I come back? Are you gonna be asleep? What if you're asleep when I get there and they say I can't see you or something?

Soobin bit his lip and sighed. "It's kind of ironic, isn't it?"

Yeonjun sent me a picture of you smiling. You look so cute in it, my squishy Soobinie Hyung. I love you so fricking much. Yeonjun just texted me saying your fever went down, and now I'm sitting here all excited. Make sure to drink lots of fluids. I think this is getting long, so I'll say goodbye now.

"No," Soobin whimpered. "Don't say goodbye."

I can't wait to see you again when I come back. Just wait for me, okay? I'll see you again. We can hug and cuddle. And I'm so sorry I'm not there for you right now. I don't want you to feel alone. I'm in a different place right now and it sucks. You're hurting, but you're trying to be happy, right? Don't do that. Let yourself cry sometimes. It's okay. I'm always here for you Soobin. No matter what.

Love,
Taehyun

Tears welled in Soobin's eyes and he sobbed into his hands, the last paragraph hitting way harder now. He grabbed Taehyun's hand, sobbing way harder at the realization of how cold his hand felt.

"Taehyun, why are you asleep?" He asked. "It's time to wake up, my beautiful boy. You have school tomorrow. Tomorrow is Wednesday. You like Wednesdays. You said that something good always happens on Wednesdays. You got good grades, you were made captain of the baseball team, you handed a bully's ass to him."

He smiled softly and looked around the room at the posters.

"Come on. It isn't funny anymore. You're gonna miss BTS's comeback this year. You don't wanna do that." He sat on the edge of the bed and cupped Taehyun's cheek in his hand. "Everybody's still saying I'm crazy or I'm throwing my life away. But you said to wait for you in that note. And you remember on Valentine's Day? "Soobin... promise me you'll stay by my side until the very end, okay?" That's what you said. And I promised you that. So I'm not gonna listen to what they say. You're the most important person in my life."

He looked away from Taehyun for a second and took a deep breath.

"I promise to stay by your side until the very end, but I need you to promise me something too, okay?" He brought Taehyun's hand up to his mouth to kiss it. "I need you to wake up. Promise me you'll get through this. Promise me you'll wake up."