Help Me

Chapter 21

Namjoon's POV:
I woke up covered in sweat, but it wasn't mine. Y/n was shaking. She started to mumble. I tried to wake her up, but she wouldn't. That's when it happened.

She started screaming. It was deafening. It was impossible to wake her. I went to get her water. When I got back, her cheeks were wet with tears. She was back to mumbling. She seamed so scared. I held her in my arms tight.

That's when she woke up. She started sobbing and yelling to be let go. "Y/n! Y/n! You're okay. You're with me. I need you to breathe okay. In. and Out." She kept sobbing. Her breathing was still uneven.

After 20 minutes, she was starting to calm down. After another 10, she was breathing normally, but still had tears cascading down her cheeks. "Y/n, what happened?"

"I don't know" she was being sincere, "I didn't see anything." She started to panic again.

"Ok, ok. That's ok. I'm right here. You're in my arms."
She clung to my right arm like a koala. Her head was on my right shoulder. We were sitting up with her right side against my chest. I held her tightly against me with my left arm.
"Your like a little koala. I'm gonna start calling you my little koala."

"Well you're the one who started holding me. So I guess I'll just have to call you my koala."

"Baby, my arms are swallowing you. You're tiny."

"Then what do I call you?"

"Your big koala. Besides, Koya is a koala, so it makes sense." She nodded into my chest.

"Ok, my big koala. Can we just stay awake. I don't want to sleep."

"That's fine. Also, I kind of want to take you on a date. We can watch a movie and order some dinner. How does that sound."

"Perfect. It sounds perfect." She wriggled out of my embrace and pecked my lips.

"Why do you always kiss me so quick?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, any kiss that occurs, it's only a peck. We've never really made out." She buried her face into my chest as she blushed. "Oh~ You don't know how to kiss. I forgot that I'm your first boyfriend." She was even more embarrassed now.

"Stop~" I chuckled as I pulled her up and out of my chest.

"You have to learn at some point. We have some extra time now. Do you want me to teach you?" This time she covered her face with her hands. "Baby, you don't have to be embarrassed. I like the idea that I get to kiss you first."

I pulled her hands away and held her head in my hands. She gave me a nervous look. "What are you thinking?"

"It's not important. Let's just start."

"No. Baby, something's wrong. We aren't doing anything until you're ok."

"It's just... I don't know. I umm... I've never done anything like this, and I don't want you to think I'm bad. And I don't want you to suppress yourself for me." She was talking quickly while she looked down visibly upset.

"Baby~ I'm not suppressing anything, nor would I think that you were a bad kisser. The point is to be a little more intimate, and to show you what it feels like. Wouldn't you want to learn with someone you love?"

"Yeah. It's just my anxiety and trust issues."

"I'm not gonna pressure you into it. When you're ready, just tell me. But I want you to know that I will never leave you."

"I know but..."

"I know baby. You have every right not to trust me. I know that it's not that you don't trust me. It's because someone you trusted hurt you."

"I also don't want to be awkward."

"It's always awkward babygirl. I think it will be fine."

"Let's just get the awkward over with then."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes." She seemed confident and nervous at the same time.

"Ok. So the main part of making out is sucking on one lip. It could be the top or the bottom. The partner get a the opposite lip. Okay"

"Could you umm..."

"Demonstrate?" I slightly smirked while raising a brow. She looked down answering my question.

I gently held her face and moved forward. Her cheeks were crimson red. I went for her bottom lip. It was so soft.

I stopped at one point to say, "You get my top lip babygirl."

I went back to her lips as she went to mine. She seemed nervous. I stopped to tell her, "Are you sure you haven't dated anyone before, 'cause you're a pro." She shyly grinned and blushed. She couldn't move her head because I was holding it.

She didn't seem to know how fast to move her lips. "We can start slow babygirl" that statement visibly calmed some of her nerves.

We went back to making out, but she pulled away. I looked at her confused, but then smiled. She was yawning. "Are you tired baby?"

"Yeah, but I don't want to sleep." I gave her the cup of water.

"Baby, I'm right here. If that happens again, I will still be here. Okay?" I pulled her body to me and placed her head over my heart. "Just focus on me baby."

Her eyes started to close and her breathing evened out. Once I knew that she was asleep, I pulled out my phone. I wanted to find out what happened to her earlier.

I looked up everything that I knew. It seemed like she had a night terror. They are more common on children. Considering that she has PTSD, it makes sense. A lot of people with PTSD have night terrors.

You don't dream, but you are afraid. It makes no sense. One can scream in their sleep and no one can wake them up. You can only wait it out. I feel so bad for my koala. She doesn't deserve any of this.