End of the Day (Mystique Trilogy 1) (COMPLETED)

Chapter 36

CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX

Hindi ko alam ang mararamdaman ko kahit na nasa loob na 'ko ng eroplano papuntang Canada. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang magiging reaksyon ko sa oras na makarating ako sa hospital. Hindi ko alam ang ihaharap kong mukha kapag nakita ko si Darren na naka-confine sa hospital pagkatapos ng ilang taon. Ilang taon na naging maayos ang kalagayan niya pero bumalik din ang kinakatakutan ko at ng magulang niya.

May sakit si Darren. Akala ko okay na siya. Akala ko hindi na babalik 'yung sakit niya. He has lymphoma. It is a cancer that begins in infection-fighting cells of the immune system, the lymphocytes. And when you have this type of cancer, lymphocytes change and grow out of control.

Darren underwent chemotherapy when he was young. Sobrang kampante kami na hindi na 'yon babalik, na hindi na uli mangyayari 'to. Noong na-ikwento 'yon sa akin, hindi ko alam kung anong mararamdaman ko. Magkahalong awa, lungkot, at sakit ang naramdaman ko. I see him as a happy-go-lucky person. Isang taong nandiyan lagi para sa 'yo. I didn't know that he's sick, not until his parents told me three days after our wedding.

By the time I set foot on Canada, I rushed down to the nearest taxi and made him drive to Foothills Medical Centre. It is two hours from here and I really can't contain what I'm feeling. I kept on crying when I was in the airplane. Tinatanong na 'ko ng isang batang katabi ko kung bakit ako umiiyak pero 'di na lang ako sumagot. I'm too tired to explain, I'm too hurt to even speak. Hindi ko na alam kung anong gagawin ko sa oras na makita ko si Darren na nakahiga sa hospital bed. Hindi ko alam kung paano ko 'to haharapin.

Suddenly, I remembered my nightmares. The picture of Monica pointing someone behind me. Someone who's on a hospital bed. Now it became clear to me, Darren was the shadow figure Monica's telling me. She warned me many times but I never thought of this because I kept on hoping that this cancer will not come back.

"Ma'am, are you okay?" The driver asked me.

Umiling ako. "No... P-Please, I need to go to Foothills as soon as possible," I said and tried to smile but I can't. Hindi naman na siya nagsalita at hinayaan na 'kong umiyak sa likod. He offered a box of tissue and I took it. I paid him more than what's on the meter. Hindi ko na inabalang kunin pa ang sukli dahil gusto ko nang makita si Darren.

Pagkapasok na pagkapasok ko sa hospital ay nanlumo kaagad ako. Mas lalong nanghina ang mga tuhod ko at kinailangan ko pang humawak sa railings ng pinto dahil pakiramdam ko ay matutumba ako. Sumabay pa ang pagkahilo ko dahil sa mga emosyon na nararamdaman ko. Samu't saring pakiramdam ang nasa dibdib ko at 'di ko na alam kung paano sila pakakalmahin.

"Juarez, Darren Jace," I said as I reach the front desk. She told me Darren's room and I quickly ran towards it. I saw Doctor Guevarra leaving the room. I thought that he's going to explain everything to me but he just smiled apologetically to me like something's wrong and I can't do something about it.

Pagpasok ko sa loob, nakita ko si Darren na nakatingin nang diretso sa kisame. I saw that his face was wet because he obviously cried. My hand flew towards my mouth and my eyes closed so hard, letting my tears fall. Several tubes were connected on his body and he lost weight so much. My tears started falling again, and when he felt my presence, I saw him fight the urge to look at me. He looked away many times and I can't bring myself to speak because of the situation we're in.

"Darren..." I called him the moment I got the strength to say his name, but he didn't look at me. "Love, please look at me." Umiling siya at patuloy na iniwas ang tingin sa 'kin. I held his face but he pushed my hand away. I wiped my tears and held his hand. "Darren, why didn't you tell me?"

"Love, what have we become?" He suddenly asked, forcing himself to smile but instead, his eyes started pooling up. "We aren't like this."

I saw how his tears fall from his eyes. I saw pain and surrender in his eyes. Ayaw ko man umiyak sa harap niya, pero wala, kanina pa bumuhos ang mga luha ko. It hurt me big-time to see him cry and to see how much he wants to give up. As much as I don't want to cry since I don't want to add up to what he's feeling, I couldn't stop it. He told me straight to the face that he doesn't want to see me cry dahil nasasaktan siya. Sinabi niya rin sa akin na minsan ay naiisip niyang sumuko sa relasyon namin dahil nakikita niya 'kong hindi masaya.