Peach Silhouette

29 | flower crowns

pub·lic·i·ty
/pəbˈlisədē/
noun
notice or attention given to someone or something by the media.

I rapidly typed on my keyboard, easily distracting myself from my thoughts by coding a new plug in. I ran my hand through my ruffled hair and went over the lines of code, checking to make sure everything was accurate. 

"Ugh, you're so serious about coding." I turned around to see Sapnap lying on my bed with his head hanging upside down and a goofy grin on his face. 

"If I get it wrong, I let people down." I said lightly. One of the many tricks I've learned is that if you say serious things lightheartedly people tend to pass right over them. 

Seemingly not Sapnap though, because his face twisted into one of concern. 

"Is this about dinner tonight?" He asked gently.

"Yeah." I sighed, picking at the black nail polish on my thumb. 

"You think too much. Everyone supports you two." He rolled his eyes. "Even if they're too open about it sometimes." 

"I know, the rational part of me knows they do, but sometimes all the faces turn into Hayden and everything I know to be true turns harsh." Sapnap sat up, and patted the space beside him. 

"Sit." I stood up and sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the ground. "Let me tell you a story." He smiled. 

"When I was just a kid, about the time I met Dream, I was pretty fucked up. Nobody really liked me, and honestly, I didn't even like myself. I grew up a little, and then Dream invited me to a VC and I met you. You were quiet and shy at first, but when you started to open up I almost fell in love," he said jokingly, but something flickered in his eyes that I just barely caught. "I always pretended like I hated you, but I always wanted to be you. No one had ever wanted to take care of me before you. Suddenly, someone was texting me morning, noon and night making sure I was drinking water, eating, sleeping - the whole bit. You made me better. And I could always tell something bothered you when people brought up dnf, and I always felt it was unfair that people made it such a big deal. You are so much more than you think you are." I blinked back tears as he finished.

"Thank you Sapnap." I wrapped him in a hug. 

"Ok, enough sentimental shit. Let's go to the garden." He grinned and offered me a hand up. We slipped into the garden, the smell of flowers tinging the air with a sweet scent. "Let's make flower crowns." He said with a quick glance at me. I nodded, laughing.

"You are so not the typically definition of someone from Texas." 

"Karl's rubbing off on me, I guess. You're not the average British snob either." He picked a few orange and white flowers, adding them to the ones he already had. I laid eyes on a pretty vibrant blue flower with billions of little petals. "Here." He offered me a bundle of queen anne's lace. 

"Thank you." I searched for the cornflowers, finding them on the far side of the garden. I caught sight of a clump of brilliant orange poppies and plucked a few. I walked toward Sapnap, silently handing him the bundle. He smiled, and our eyes met. 

"We never spend anytime together." He sighed as we sat down with our collections. I began to piece my crown together and frowned. 

"You're right, we don't." He handled his crown delicately, and with an intriguing precision he began to slip the flowers in between each other, ordering them exactly the way he wanted to. When we both finished, we looked up at the clock. It was almost time for dinner, and that made my palms sweat. 

"Hey, you'll be fine." Sapnap said softly. He looked at me, and then lifted the crown off his head and placed it on mine. I did the same, making sure the mess of colors rested upon his head securely. We stood up and made our way to the dining room. People began to collect; Tommy, Wilbur, Niki, and Techno. Then finally, Dream appeared. 

He sat down next to me. 

"What's this?" He gestured to my flower crown. I took it off and thrust it aside, embarassed. 

"Nothing," I replied nonchalantly. I felt Sapnap flinch beside me, and a pang of regret spiked through me. 

The time in the garden had been so childish and freeing, but I pushed it to the edge of my memory as the dinner began. 

It went well, as Sapnap had promised. Everyone was accepting, and I was thankful for that. I finally felt whole, no more demons or nightmares clouding my thoughts. 

Everything was going to be ok. 

Later, Dream laid asleep beside me while I sat up, scribbling in my notebook. 

January 26th, 2022

When I first arrived in this house, life felt crushing. I felt like nothing would ever go right, and I would always be stuck in the same cycle of grief and terror.

Dream taught me how to move on. He taught me how to live. And I know the story's nowhere near finished, but I can't wait to live the rest of it. 

Life could take us so many places now, so many wonderful oppurtunities as long as we stay. 

And I do believe we will stay. I trust Dream, I always have. 

He was the answer to everything I asked for, everything I hoped for, and everything I ever wanted. 

He is mine, I am his; it's simple as that.

Thank God for the simple. 

Thank God for the simple.

I never thought I would make it this far. I never ever thought I'd ever arrive to happier. 

This is home. 

Oh my god, this is bloody home. 

and man do i have so many problems, but they will be solved with time. i have full faith in that. 

I am happy now. 

~

inspiring song(s)

supercuts - jeremy zucker

love me harder - ariana grande

stockholm syndrome - one direction

love you like that - dagny

emily - jeremy zucker

~
an: ugh thank god George isn't the main character anymore /hj /lh

thank you for reading hehe, and I can't believe I got another chapter out. maybe we'll speedrun the story and Wattpad :)
I love you all and afri out <3